Subject: Sports (Page 87)

The way my team are doing, we could get Wilt Chamberlain in a trade and find out that he's really two midgets Scotch-taped together.

American basketball player & coach
Basketball Sports

I liked the choreography, but I didn't care for the costumes.

(1939 – ) American actor, dancer, singer, producer & choreographer
Appearance Basketball Body Clothing Sports

There is water in every lane, so it is OK.

Australian swimmer
Sports

It's kind of like tumbling around inside a giant clothes-drier.

American motorcycle racer
Sports

All those football coaches who hold dressing-room prayers before a game should be forced to attend church once a week.

(1915 – 1987) American football player and coach
Beliefs Sports

I used to play sports, then I realized you can buy trophies.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Sports

If you’d offered me a 69 at the start this morning I’d have been all over you.

Scottish professional golfer
Golf Misspokements Sports

Baseball is drama with an endless run and an ever-changing cast.

(1926 – 2016) American baseball player, announcer & television host
Baseball Sports

It was close for Zaheer, Lawson threw his hands in the air and Marsh threw his head in the air.

cricket commentator
Misspokements Sports

You don’t realize how easy this game is until you get up in that broadcasting booth.

(1931 – 1995) American baseball player
Baseball Sports

These people haven’t seen the last of my face. If I go down, I’m going down standing up.

American basketball player
Basketball Misspokements Sports

He wants Texas back.

Los Angeles Dodgers’ manager
Baseball Sports

Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Golf Sports

God invented football so grown men would have something to do between wars.

(1929 – ) American author & sportswriter
Conflict Football Sports War

I feel like I’m the best, but you’re not going to get me to say that.

professional football player
Football Misspokements Sports

Everything Tyson's got has 'goodnight' written on it.

American boxing referee
Boxing Sports

In football everything is complicated by the presence of the opposite team.


(1905 – 1980) French existentialist philosopher, playwright & novelist,
Football Sports

Don King is one of the great humanitarians of our time. He has risen above that great term, prejudice. He has screwed everybody he has ever been around. Hog, dog, or frog, it don't matter to Don. If you got a quarter, he wants the first 26 cents.

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor
Boxing Insults Sports

Three things are bad for you: I can't remember the first two, but doughnuts are the third.

football coach
Food/Drink Football Health Sports

The company should change its name to Mike.

American basketball player
Basketball Sports

The kid looks good in his first game.

(1928 – ) Canadian professional ice hockey player
Hockey Sports