Subject: Sports (Page 94)

My idea of managing is giving the ball to Tom Seaver and sitting down and watching him work.

(1934 – 2010) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

Whenever they gave him the game ball, he ate it.

American football player
Football Sports

Really, there are none. We traded him for a 10th round pick in a nine-round draft.

professional hockey player
Hockey Sports

Finishing second means you are the first driver to lose.

(1950 – 1982) Canadian racing driver
Auto racing Sports

Sugar Ray Leonard was asked by Johnny Carson, “When do the wounds from the fight heal?”
His reply: “When the check clears.”

American boxing champion
Boxing Sports

Umpire's heaven is a place where he works third base every game; home is where the heartache is.

(1937 – 1995) American Major League Baseball umpire
Baseball Sports

Yes, golf can be taught – it’s just that it can’t be learned.

(1926 – 2010) Canadian actor
Golf Sports

Don't worry, the fans don't start booing until July.

(1930 – 2013) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

Kent Abbott is in the on-deck circuit.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Malaprops Sports

That guy has muscles in places most people don't have places.

American basketball broadcaster
Appearance Basketball Body Sports

How hard is it to coach track? … tell ‘em to stay to the left and get back as fast as you can.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach
Sports

Golf is like chasing a quinine pill around a cow pasture.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Activities Golf Sports

He's ranked number three in Britain, number four in the world. You can't get any higher!

English darts player
Misspokements Sports

We don’t need refs, but I guess white guys need something to do.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball People Sports

I know I've got a lock on the Dutch Hall of Fame.

Dutch-born American baseball pitcher
Baseball Places Sports

The older you get, the faster you ran as a kid.

professional football player & coach
Age Football Memory Sports

I'm happy for him [Gil Hodges]; that is, if you think becoming a big league manager is a good thing to have happen to you.

American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

God watches over drunks and third basemen.

(1906 – 1991) American baseball player, coach & manager
Baseball Sports

I didn’t drop my gloves. They were yanked off me.

professional hockey player
Hockey Sports

If you even dream of beating me you'd better wake up and apologize.

(1942 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Sports

I had to pinch myself seeing the grassy knoll and the book suppository building.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Misspokements Sports