Subject: Time (Page 12)

Never tell a secret to a bride or a groom; wait until they have been married longer.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Husbands Marriage Time Wives

When there are sufficient funds in the checking account, checks take two weeks to clear; when there are insufficient funds, checks clear overnight.

Money Murphy’s Laws Time

In times like these, it helps to recall that there have always been times like these.

(1918 – 2009) radio broadcaster
History Time

Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.

(1769 – 1821) French general & politician
Time

The only things that start on time are those that you're late for.

Murphy’s Laws Situations Time

If this is airing in the future and no one knows who Karl Rove is — he’s the reason you all live underground.

(1974 – ) Russian-born American comedian, writer & filmmaker
Death Future People Time

Peace: In international affairs, a period of cheating between two periods of fighting.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Fights Politics Time

It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.

Emotions Memory Past

To spot the expert, pick the one who predicts the job will take the longest and cost the most.

Money Murphy’s Laws People Time

The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Language Time

The first 90 percent of the task takes 90 percent of the time. The last 10 percent takes the other 90 percent.

Murphy’s Laws Time

There’s an old saying about those who forget history… I don’t remember it, but it’s good.

(1964 – ) comedian, political satirist, writer & television host
History Time

The time spent on any item of the agenda will be in inverse proportion to the sum involved.

Murphy’s Laws Time

A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.

Murphy’s Laws Time

I think, in 10 years, hell's gonna be the only place left where you can still smoke.

(1965 – ) American comedian
Activities Future Places Time

You can fool some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time, and that is sufficient.

Murphy’s Laws People Time

History repeats itself; historians repeat each other.

(1889 – 1944) English historian
History Occupations Time

Tell him I’ve been too f**king busy – or vice versa.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Activities Sex Situations Time

My friend Winnie is a procrastinator…. he didn’t get his birthmark until he was eight years old.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Characteristics People Time

New Year's Day… now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions; next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Situations Time

It is much easier to repent of sins that we have committed than to repent of those we intend to commit.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Characteristics Time