Subject: Time (Page 14)

Give me two years, and I'll make her an overnight star.

(1891 – 1958) American president of Columbia Pictures & producer
Success Time

Only after locking your toolbox/shed at the end of a DIY job do you find another tool to return to your toolbox/shed.

Murphy’s Laws Things Time

The secret of eternal youth is arrested development.

(1884 – 1980) author & wit
Age Time

Good Old Days: A block of time which ended a week before you were hired.

Definitions Past Time Work

I do not object to people looking at their watches when I am speaking; but I strongly object when they start shaking them to make certain they are still going.

(1883 – 1962) British barrister, judge, politician & preacher
Communication Speech Time

Women reach their sexual peak after 35 years; men reach theirs after about four minutes.

(1972 – ) Anglo-Irish comedian, writer & actor
Men People Sex Time Women

Dawn: 1. The time when men of reason go to bed. 2. When the sun first shines on your hangover.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions Time

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.

(1803 – 1869) French Romantic composer
Education Life Time

No speech can be entirely bad if it is short enough.

(1876 – 1944) American author, humorist & columnist
Communication Speech Time

The remaining work to finish in order to reach your goal increases as the deadline approaches.

Time Work

Perhaps nothing has changed in the course of history as much as historians.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
History Time

The larger the project or job, the less time there is to do it.

Murphy’s Laws Time

Nothing is more responsible for the good old days than a bad memory.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Intelligence Memory Past

A man with one watch knows what time it is; a man with two watches is never sure.

Murphy’s Laws Things Time

When there are sufficient funds in the checking account, checks take two weeks to clear; when there are insufficient funds, checks clear overnight.

Money Murphy’s Laws Time

Retirement: The time of life when you stop lying about your age and start lying about the house.

Definitions Time Work

Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering… and it’s all over much too soon.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Death Emotions Life Time

I'm afraid that fulfilling my potential would really cut into my sitting around time.

(1970 – ) American stand-up comedian & voice actor
Characteristics Time

I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn’t have to go so fast.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Sports Time

What year did Jesus think it was?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
History Time

There is nothing more permanent than a temporary tax.

Murphy’s Laws Taxes Time