Subject: Time (Page 14)

Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Future Life Time

If you play with anything long enough, it will break.

Murphy’s Laws Things Time

We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.

Situations Time

Progress might have been all right once, but it has gone on too long.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Situations Time

Original thought is like original sin: both happened before you were born to people you could not have possibly met.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Intelligence People Thinking Time

No matter how long or how hard you shop for an item, after you've bought it it will be on sale somewhere cheaper.

Money Murphy’s Laws Shopping Time

Cheese – milk's leap toward immortality.

(1904 – 1999) author, editor, radio host
Food/Drink Time

Ain’t nobody out at that time a night but burglars and bad women.

Expressions Time

Anyone who believes you can't change history has never tried to write his memoirs.

(1886 – 1973) Israeli prime minister
Books Communication History Reading/Writing

Tell him I’ve been too f**king busy – or vice versa.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Activities Sex Situations Time

A wife lasts only for the length of the marriage, but an ex-wife is there for the rest of your life.

(1948 – 1990) comedian
Divorce Marriage Time Wives

I’ve been on a diet for two weeks and all I’ve lost is two weeks.

(1930 – 1978) American comedian
Eating Food/Drink Time

In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.

(1874 – 1963) American poet
Life Time

After two days in hospital I took a turn for the nurse.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Health Time

Howard: It was an hour ago, Sheldon. A Jew sits in front of a house in Texas for that long, for sale signs start to go up.

(1980 – ) American actor, comedian & musician
Time TV/Movie Quotes

Now is the time for all good men to come to.

(1913 – 1973) American animator & cartoonist (Pogo)
People Time

Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid all together.

Murphy’s Laws Time

Punctuality: The art of arriving for an appointment just in time to be indignant at the tardiness of the other party.

Definitions Time

It isn't that things will necessarily go wrong (Murphy's Law), but rather that they will take so much more time and effort than you think if they are not to go wrong.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Time

The first ninety percent of the task takes ninety percent of the time, and the last ten percent takes the other ninety percent.

Murphy’s Laws Time Work

On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.

(1962 – ) writer & journalist
Death People Time