Subject: Time (Page 16)

No matter how long or how hard you shop for an item, after you've bought it it will be on sale somewhere cheaper.

Money Murphy’s Laws Shopping Time

Why do they collect garbage at 5 a.m.; it’s garbage… it’s not going to go bad again.

(1965 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Situations Time

The girl with a future avoids a man with a past.

(1899 – 1995) humorist
Future Men Past People Time Women

Doing a thing well is often a waste of time.

(1930 – ) American author and billiard player, teacher & commentator
Situations Time

I didn’t think prohibition would last that long.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol Food/Drink Time

1. Important mail arrives late. 2. Junk mail arrives the day it was sent.

Murphy’s Laws Time

Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

Situations Time

The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.

Proverbs Situations Time

No project was ever completed on time and within budget.

Money Murphy’s Laws Time

I've got my faults, but living in the past isn't one of them; there's no future in it.

(1934 – 2010) American baseball manager
Future Misspokements Past Time

Up at the crank of dawn.

(1905 – 1974) radio comedian
Malaprops Time

There’s no future in time travel.

Activities Future Past Time Travel

As soon as you dispose of a book, even one that has gathered dust for years, a pressing need to refer to it will arise.

Books Murphy’s Laws Time

The last rush-hour express bus to your neighborhood leaves five minutes before you get off work.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Time Travel

The surest way to be late is to have plenty of time.

(1907 – 2000) Canadian poet & critic
Time

I’ve just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday; I’ll tell you what… never again.

(1967 – ) English actor, writer & comedian
Activities Time

Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.

Life Murphy’s Laws Time

I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era when so many things were going so right for so many of the wrong persons.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
People Situations Time

Instant gratification takes too long.

(1956 – ) author & movie actress
Time

Four years ago… no, it was yesterday.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Time

Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Food/Drink Time