Subject: Time (Page 26)

The distance to the gate from which your flight departs is inversely proportional to the time remaining before the scheduled departure of the flight.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Time Travel

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband, while a man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

Future Husbands Marriage Proverbs Time Wives

The effort expended by the bureaucracy in defending any error is in direct proportion to the size of the error.

Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems Time

Early to rise and early to bed makes a male healthy and wealthy and dead.

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist
Death Life Men People Time

Doing a thing well is often a waste of time.

(1930 – ) American author and billiard player, teacher & commentator
Situations Time

Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.

Life Murphy’s Laws Time

Love is the only industry which can't operate on a five-day week.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Emotions Love Time Work

Original thought is like original sin: both happened before you were born to people you could not have possibly met.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Intelligence People Thinking Time

There is something wrong when you wait in line thirty minutes to get a hamburger that was cooked for ninety seconds an hour ago.

(1946 – 1994) writer & humorist
Food/Drink Time

You will save yourself a lot of needless worry if you don't burn your bridges until you come to them.

Murphy’s Laws Situations Time

Believe me, you have to get up early if you want to get out of bed.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Situations Time

I bought a clock, but the big hand broke off of it… so I just added “ish” to every number.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Time

Tradition is the illusion of permanence.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Situations Time

Good times end too quickly. Bad times go on forever.

Life Murphy’s Laws Situations Time

Anyone who believes you can't change history has never tried to write his memoirs.

(1886 – 1973) Israeli prime minister
Books Communication History Reading/Writing

Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week.

Proverbs Time

What year did Jesus think it was?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
History Time

I tend to live in the past because most of my life is there.

(1916 – 1997) newspaper journalist
Life Past Time

The trouble with being poor is that it takes up all of your time.

(1924 – 1997) Dutch-American artist
Money Poverty Time

Women with "pasts" interest men because men hope that history will repeat itself.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Characteristics Men Past People Women

Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.

Murphy’s Laws Situations Time