Subject: Tom Swifties

Tom Swifties:

A Tom Swifty is a phrase in which a quoted sentence is linked by a pun to the manner in which it is attributed. The name comes from the Tom Swift series of books.

“The pool player from USC had to drop out because the proper equipment didn’t arrive on time,” Tom calculated.

Tom Swifties

“Has my magazine arrived?” Tom asked periodically.

Tom Swifties

“That may cause my violin strings to snap,” was Tom’s gut reaction.

Tom Swifties

“My giant sea creature died,” Tom wailed blubberingly.

Tom Swifties

“I want to date other women,” said Tom unsteadily.

Tom Swifties

“Some day, people will be able to file lawsuits against computers,” said Tom soothingly.

Tom Swifties

“I’ll get you out of prison in no time,” said Tom balefully.

Tom Swifties

“I guess she fell off the motorcycle,” said Tom ruthlessly.

Tom Swifties

“I have no recollection of the last twenty-four hours,” said Tom lackadaisically.

Tom Swifties

“I don’t want to rewrite this in prose,” said Tom aversely.

Tom Swifties

“Nobody has scored yet in the tennis game,” said Tom lovingly.

Tom Swifties

“Have some shampoo,” was Tom’s unconditional offer.

Tom Swifties

“I’ve been having an incontinence problem,” Tom gushed.

Tom Swifties

“My garden needs another layer of mulch,” Tom repeated.

Tom Swifties

“Come up to my apartment,” Tom said flatly.

Tom Swifties

“Wool is better than cotton,” Tom said sheepishly.

Tom Swifties

“That’s especially stupid!” said Tom superciliously.

Tom Swifties

“Nay!” said Tom hoarsely.

Tom Swifties

“And to think I swallowed that lie, hook, line and sinker!” Tom gulped.

Tom Swifties

“Ignore the first three turnings,” directed Tom forthrightly.

Tom Swifties

“Sesame,” said Tom openly.

Tom Swifties