Subject: Tom Swifties (Page 12)

“This salmon is excellent,” said Tom superficially.

Tom Swifties

“Boy, I wish the elevator were working,” said Tom, staring up to the top.

Tom Swifties

“I’ve stopped seeing my therapist”, said Tom unshrinkingly.

Tom Swifties

“I have been reading Voltaire,” Tom admitted candidly.

Tom Swifties

“It’s not a candy mint, it’s a breath mint”, Tom asserted.

Tom Swifties

“For goodness sakes, use a broom,” Tom bristled.

Tom Swifties

“My friend and I steal things together,” Tom corroborated.

Tom Swifties

“I’ve gained thirty pounds,” said Tom heavily.

Tom Swifties

“I wonder if this will unlock the palace gates,” said Tom kinkily.

Tom Swifties

“Doctor, why do you have to remove my womb?” asked Mary hysterically.

Tom Swifties

“Who left the toilet seat down?” Tom asked peevishly.

Tom Swifties

“Don’t you dare shoot that rubberband at me!” she snapped.

Tom Swifties

“It’s made the grass wet,” said Tom after due consideration.

Tom Swifties

“This Bud’s for you,” said Tom lightly.

Tom Swifties

“This boat leaks,” said Tom balefully.

Tom Swifties

“It’s not fair!” said Tom darkly.

Tom Swifties

“The executioner has received the tool he needs”, said Tom with a heavy accent.

Tom Swifties

“I’ve only enough carpet for the hall and landing,” said Tom with a blank stare.

Tom Swifties

“I’ve removed all the feathers from this chicken,” said Tom pluckily.

Tom Swifties

“You find it very large?” said Mr. Podsnap, spaciously

Tom Swifties

“Getting rid of acid is easy,” said Tom basically.

Tom Swifties