Subject: Tom Swifties (Page 23)

“I’ve been having an incontinence problem,” Tom gushed.

Tom Swifties

“Let’s all play an A, a C#, and an E”, cried the band with one accord.

Tom Swifties

“The executioner has received the tool he needs”, said Tom with a heavy accent.

Tom Swifties

“Ought I to do this?” asked Tom with a shudder.

Tom Swifties

“Don’t add too much water,” said Tom with great concentration.

Tom Swifties

“This steamroller is amazing,” said Tom flatteringly.

Tom Swifties

“Those cobs are amazing!” said Tom cornily.

Tom Swifties

“I’ve gained thirty pounds,” said Tom heavily.

Tom Swifties

“Don’t let me drown in Egypt!” pleaded Tom, deep in denial.

Tom Swifties

“I chop down trees for a living,” said Tom lumberingly.

Tom Swifties

“That’s especially stupid!” said Tom superciliously.

Tom Swifties

“Get out of my hair,” was Tom’s brush-off.

Tom Swifties

“I want a motorized bicycle,” Tom moped.

Tom Swifties

“This must be an aerobics class,” Tom worked out.

Tom Swifties

“I'll have a martini,” said Tom, dryly.

Tom Swifties

“Pass the playing cards,” said Tom ideally.

Tom Swifties

“I only use one herb when I cook,” said Tom sagely.

Tom Swifties

“Take me to the dance,” Mary bawled.

Tom Swifties

“England is okay, except there seems to be at least one blood-sucking insect in every outhouse”, said Tom aloofly.

Tom Swifties

“I’m being sent down to the minors,” said Tom beleagueredly.

Tom Swifties

“I have a split personality,” said Tom, being frank.

Tom Swifties