Subject: Tom Swifties (Page 5)

“Are you all governors?” Tom asked, bored.

Tom Swifties

“That young insect is female,” said Tom gallantly.

Tom Swifties

“Sorry! I’ve accidentally pierced your cheek instead,” said Tom mysteriously.

Tom Swifties

“How do you start a model-T Ford without a battery?” asked Tom crankily.

Tom Swifties

“I’ve got to stop this motor,” Tom choked.

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“Have some shampoo,” was Tom’s unconditional offer.

Tom Swifties

“The door’s ajar,” said Tom openly.

Tom Swifties

“I won’t buy a circuit breaker,” Tom refused.

Tom Swifties

“So, it’s a duel you want!” Tom shot back.

Tom Swifties

“My compliments to the company that makes the Macintosh computer”, said Tom applaudingly.

Tom Swifties

“I have to check the score on this exam again,” Tom remarked.

Tom Swifties

“I only use one herb when I cook,” said Tom sagely.

Tom Swifties

“I can no longer hear anything,” said Tom deftly.

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“I don’t have a boyfriend,” said Mary guilelessly.

Tom Swifties

“The average frequency of my voice is 160 Hz,” said Tom in measured tones.

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“The seesaw is upside down,” said Tom saucily.

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“I’ve only enough carpet for the hall and landing,” said Tom with a blank stare.

Tom Swifties

I know who turned off the lights,” Tom hinted darkly.

Tom Swifties

“It’s my personal magnetism,” said Tom ironically.

Tom Swifties

“Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays I sleep in a wigwam; Tuesdays, Thursdays, and weekends I sleep in a teepee”, said Tom very attentively.

Tom Swifties

“You find it very large?” said Mr. Podsnap, spaciously

Tom Swifties