Subject: TV/Movie Quotes (Page 24)

Frasier: And where the hell do you think you’re going?

Martin: To sit in the tub with a toaster and wait for the power to come back on.

(1940 – 2018) English-American actor & comedian
TV/Movie Quotes

The carpet sweeper is the biggest scam perpetrated on the American public since one-hour Martinizing.

(1949 – ) American actor, comedian & writer
TV/Movie Quotes

Cliff: Hey Carla, I have a potato that looks like Richard Milhouse Nixon.

Carla: Big deal. Show me one that doesn’t.

(1948 – ) American actress
TV/Movie Quotes

Aunt Esther: Who you calling ugly, sucker?

Fred: I’m calling you ugly, I could push our face in some dough and make gorilla cookies.

(1922 – 1991) American comedian
Appearance TV/Movie Quotes Ugly

Marge, I’m going to miss you so much; and it’s not just the sex; it’s also the food preparation.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

The boy's about as sharp as a bowling ball.

cartoon character (Mel Blanc)
Insults Stupidity TV/Movie Quotes

Nietzsche says that we will live the same life, over and over again… Great, I’ll have to sit through the Ice Capades again.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Life Situations TV/Movie Quotes

It was announced Thursday that the Army will allow recruits to sign up for just 15 months of active duty; if that doesn’t work, the military will try renaming Iraq ‘Super Cancun.’

(1971 – ) American actress, comedian, producer & writer
Government Military TV/Movie Quotes

Thornton Melon: Look, I’m throwing a little party in our room tonight, and you’d better be there.
Diane: Oh, I’m sorry. I have a date with Philip tonight.
Melon: [groans] Bring him along! We may run outta ice.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Boy's like a dead horse – got no get up and go.

cartoon character (Mel Blanc)
TV/Movie Quotes

Peggy: I’m sitting on something!

Professor Quail: I lost mine in the stock market.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
TV/Movie Quotes

Vampires are make-believe, just like elves, gremlins and Eskimos.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

Whoa. Where you going in those pants? 1982?

(1964 – ) American actress, producer & director
Appearance Clothing TV/Movie Quotes

Frasier: I’ve been taking stock of myself.

Carla: Not exactly AT&T, is it?

(1948 – ) American actress
Self TV/Movie Quotes

Al Qaeda on Friday released a statement confirming the death of Osama Bin Laden. They also announced that, as a result, Monday will be a half-day.

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
TV/Movie Quotes

I’m going to take the high road, and just because I’m high.

(1958 – ) American actress & singer
Alcohol TV/Movie Quotes

Porkchops and bacon, my two favorite animals.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Animals TV/Movie Quotes

We’re not fighting, Carla. We’re merely discussing a little difference of opinion… I think Sam is a heartless mindless slack-jawed cretin and he disagrees.

(1949 – ) American actress
TV/Movie Quotes

The whole conjugation was asleep.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes

Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?

(1926 – 2010) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Rando: Nice wig, Janice. What’s it made of?
Janis: Your mom’s chest hair!

(1982 – ) American actress & model
Appearance Hair TV/Movie Quotes