Subject: TV/Movie Quotes (Page 39)

When I'm good I'm very, very good… but when I'm bad, I'm better.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
TV/Movie Quotes

Can’t you be indelicate for once?

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

There's an empty spot I've always had inside me. I tried to fill it with family, religion, community service, but those were dead ends! I think this chair is the answer.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Self TV/Movie Quotes

Note to self: Stop. Doing. Anything.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Self TV/Movie Quotes

If you can’t say anything nice… say it about Diane.

(1948 – ) American actress
TV/Movie Quotes

With a little study you’ll go a long ways… and I wish you’d start now.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
TV/Movie Quotes

I’ve got drinks piling up on my desk and a stack of pills I have even opened yet!

(1958 – ) American actress & singer
Alcohol TV/Movie Quotes

The good ones screw you, the bad ones screw you, and the rest don’t know how to screw you.

(1956 – ) English-Canadian actress
TV/Movie Quotes

[to his now-fat ex-wife, at their daughter’s wedding] Remember, you haven’t lost a daughter – you’ve gained a ton.

(1935 – ) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Kids, kids, I'm not going to die; that only happens to bad people.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Death TV/Movie Quotes

Can I draw you a beer, Norm?

No, I know what they look like; just pour me one.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

The two of you was intricate together.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes

Coach: What will it be, Normie?

Norm: A transfusion with a head on it.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

Huntington Beach, California this past weekend was the site of the second annual Surf City Surf Dog competition… or as the sharks call it…‘Thanksgiving’.

(1973 – ) American comedian, actor & television host
TV/Movie Quotes

I don’ t know if you’ ve read my book, “Advanced Sexual Positions: How to Achieve Them Without Laughing.”

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Sex TV/Movie Quotes

Cross my heart and hope to eat my weight in goslings.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
TV/Movie Quotes

I wonder about things, like, if they call an orange an “orange,” then why don’t we call a banana a “yellow” or an apple a “red”? Blueberries, I understand; but will someone explain gooseberries to me?

(1938 – ) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

People go to casinos for the same reason they go on blind dates – hoping to hit the jackpot; but mostly, you just wind up broke or alone in a bar.

(1965 – ) American actress, model, singer & producer
TV/Movie Quotes

[to the family] Dinner's gonna be late. [goes outside] Here, boy! Here, boy!


TV/Movie Quotes

Luna: You were screaming out different names in your sleep.

Miles: I was having sexual nightmares.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
TV/Movie Quotes

Sir, are you trying to offer me a bribe? … How much?

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
TV/Movie Quotes