Subject: TV/Movie Quotes (Page 42)

If God wanted you to eat Puerto Rican Food, he would have lined your stomach with Pepto Bismol.

(1922 – 1991) American comedian
TV/Movie Quotes

Frasier: I asked Dad to get me a bran muffin. You know what he said to me? “What’s the magic word?”
Niles: You’re kidding.
Frasier: He didn’t think it was very amusing when I said, “Rest home!”

(1955 – ) American actor, comedian, producer, director & singer
TV/Movie Quotes

How long do cats live? Like assuming you don’t throw ‘em under a bus or something?

(1969 – ) American actress, film director & producer
Animals Cats TV/Movie Quotes

Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, would you give me a hand with the bags?

Igor: Certainly. You take the blonde and I’ll take the one in the turban.

(1934 – 1982) English writer, comedian & actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Look how she moves… it’s like Jell-O on springs!

(1925 – 2001) actor & musician
TV/Movie Quotes

Boris: How many lovers do you have?

Sonja: In the mid-town area?

1946 – ) American film actress, director & producer
TV/Movie Quotes

Of course the Soviet Union was bound to fall! It's on the edge of the map!

(1971 – ) American actress
Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

Al, when I married you for richer or poorer, I thought we'd try one and then the other and then choose. I think we've gone just about as far as we can go with the first one.

(1954 – ) American actress & singer-songwriter
Marriage TV/Movie Quotes

I’m callin’ you ugly, I could stick yo face in some dough and make some gorilla cookies.

(1922 – 1991) American comedian
Appearance TV/Movie Quotes Ugly

Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes

I’ve been like a mother to that girl. I’ve locked her in her room, told her she was fat, and once I even left her in a store!

(1958 – ) American actress & singer
Family Mothers TV/Movie Quotes

Morticia: My baby is ill, and my husband is dying. Oh Mama, what shall I do?

Grandma: Well, you have a black dress.

(1952 – ) American actress
TV/Movie Quotes

Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here… this is the War Room!

(1925 – 1980) British comedian & actor
TV/Movie Quotes

You’re sicker than me? Edith, get me the other fomometer.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes

I have low self-esteem, but I express it the healthy way… by eating a box of Double-Stuf Oreos.

(1966) American actress
TV/Movie Quotes

Women… if they're not turning down your proposals for marriage, they're accusing you of suspicious behavior in the women's lingerie changing room.

(1947 – ) American actor & entrepreneur
TV/Movie Quotes Women

Condoleezza Rice made a surprise trip to Iraq on Sunday; also surprised to be in Iraq on Sunday: thousands of U.S. troops who were supposed to be home by Christmas.

(1971 – ) American actress, comedian, producer & writer
TV/Movie Quotes

It’s not about who you love, it’s how you love. Genitalia is just God’s way of accessorizing.

(1943 – ) American actress
TV/Movie Quotes

You take a chance getting up in the morning, crossing the street, or sticking your face in a fan.

(1926 – 2010) Canadian actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Cousin Vicki: I’m going steady, and I French kiss.
Audrey Griswold: So? Everybody does that.
Cousin Vicki: Yeah, but Daddy says I’m the best at it.

(1968 – ) American actress & singer
TV/Movie Quotes

Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.


Situations TV/Movie Quotes