Subject: TV/Movie Quotes (Page 47)

[After the mob on horseback encounters a toll booth] Somebody’s gotta go back and get a shitload of dimes.

(1919 – 1983) American rodeo performer & actor
TV/Movie Quotes

[while filling out an application for Jim] Bobby: Mental illness or narcotic addiction?

Jim: Now that’s a tough choice…

(1938 – ) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

What’s the matter? You’re pacing like an expectant father with the clap.

(1950 – ) American actor & comedian
TV/Movie Quotes

Esther Clavin: The last thing I want to see is my son’s face on the 11 o’clock news.

Carla: There’s an entire city that agrees with you.

(1947 – ) American actor & entrepreneur
Appearance TV/Movie Quotes

What in the Wide, Wide World of Sports’s is a-goin’ on here?! I hired you boys to lay a little track… not to dance around like a bunch of Kansas City faggots!

(1919 – 1983) American rodeo performer & actor
TV/Movie Quotes

The ironing is delicious.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Nancy Cartwright)
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes

Fred Sanford: I still want to sow some wild oats.

Lamont: At your age, you don’t have no wild oats, you got shredded wheat.

(1946 – ) American actor
Sex TV/Movie Quotes

I can’t figure women out. They only think about themselves. Why, during sex, Vanessa – she used to scream out her own name!

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
TV/Movie Quotes

A woman is a lot like a refrigerator: 6 feet tall, 300 pounds… it makes ice.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
TV/Movie Quotes Women

“Let ’em eat cake,” to quote the late Mark Antonette.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes

Aunt Esther: Who you calling ugly, sucker?

Fred: I’m calling you ugly, I could push our face in some dough and make gorilla cookies.

(1922 – 1991) American comedian
Appearance TV/Movie Quotes Ugly

Frasier: I asked Dad to get me a bran muffin. You know what he said to me? “What’s the magic word?”
Niles: You’re kidding.
Frasier: He didn’t think it was very amusing when I said, “Rest home!”

(1955 – ) American actor, comedian, producer, director & singer
TV/Movie Quotes

Susan: A real woman could stop you from drinking

Arthur: It’d have to be a real big woman.

(1935 – 2002) English actor, comedian, composer & musician
TV/Movie Quotes

There’s an old saying, “Ya don’t keep runnin’ after you catch the bus.”

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

Ed, have you noticed that the older you get, the younger your girlfriends get? Soon you’ll be dating sperm.

(1948 – ) comedian, actor, writer, producer & film director
Dating Relationships TV/Movie Quotes

Or what, you port-brained twerp?! I’ve looked after you all my life! Even when we were babies, I had to show you which bit of your mother was serving the drinks!

(1955 – ) English actor
TV/Movie Quotes

It is harder for the spider to catch a fly than it is for the fly to catch a horse.

(1928 – 1994) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Al: Anything for dinner, Peg?

Peg: Get a wife!

(1954 – ) American actress & singer-songwriter
Marriage TV/Movie Quotes

South Dakota Gov. Mike Rounds on Monday signed legislation banning almost all abortions in the state; as a result, South Dakota is changing its motto from ‘Under God, the People Rule’ to ‘You should have thought of that before prom.’

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
TV/Movie Quotes

Ambassador Trentino: I didn’t come here to be insulted!

Rufus T. Firefly: That’s what you think!

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Insults TV/Movie Quotes

Uggh, the devil farts in my face once again…

(1955 – ) English actor
TV/Movie Quotes