Subject: TV/Movie Quotes (Page 55)

Coach: Norm: you’re in here every night, doesn’t your wife ever wonder where you’re at?

Norm: Wonders… doesn’t care… but she wonders.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Stop soft soapin’ and trying to deterge the judge!

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

Phoebe: [Right after playing a song in the coffee shop] If you want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer.

(1963 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
TV/Movie Quotes

Raj: Isn’t there a policy against dating graduate students?
Leonard: No, if you can talk to them, you can ask them out.
Raj: Damn, there’s always a catch.

(1981 – ) Indian-English actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Coach: How about a beer, Norm?

Norm: Hey I’m high on life, Coach… of course, beer is my life.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

If women don't find you handsome they should at least find you handy.

(1945 – ) Canadian comedian & actor
People TV/Movie Quotes Women

We produce more failed pilots than the French air force.

(1958 – ) American actor & producer
Entertainment Television TV/Movie Quotes

You shoot me in a dream, you better wake up and apologize.

(1939 – ) American actor & producer
TV/Movie Quotes

Monty: [about his Mother-In-Law] She says I drink too much, I smoke too much, I gamble. I mean she’s right, but what can I do? I got no… what’s the word…

Nicky: Class.

(1943 – ) American actor, musician & comedian
Insults TV/Movie Quotes

My favorite kind of wild animal is on a plate.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Animals TV/Movie Quotes

Farm: A hunk of land on which, if you get up early enough mornings and work late enough nights, you’ll make a fortune – if you strike oil on it.

(1896 – 1988) American actor
Definitions TV/Movie Quotes

People who work putting shoes on fat women who wear dresses should not have 20/20 vision.

(1946 – ) American actor
Occupations TV/Movie Quotes Work

George: She calls me up at my office. She says, “We have to talk.”
Jerry: Ugh. The four worst words in the English language.
George: That or “Whose bra is this?”

(1959 – ) American actor, director, writer, singer & comedian
Relationships TV/Movie Quotes

Fester, I hope one day you feel the indescribable joy of having kids, and having someone else raise them.

(1940 – 1994) Puerto Rican actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Do you think that suppository is gonna be safe from me there, Edith?

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Health Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

Right, and the check is in my mouth.

(1971 – ) American actress
Mixed metaphors TV/Movie Quotes

Egbert: Was I in here last night and did I spend a twenty-dollar bill?

Bartender: Yeah.

Egbert: Oh boy, what a load that is off my mind. I thought I’d lost it.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Alcohol TV/Movie Quotes

We played strip chess. She had me down to my shorts and I fainted from tension.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Activities TV/Movie Quotes

Kyle, [his daughter’s boyfriend] just so you know, if you ever pull into my driveway and honk, you better be delivering a package because you’re sure as hell not picking anything up.

(1948 – 2003) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Woody: What’s going on Mr. Peterson?

Norm: The question is, “What’s going in Mr. Peterson?” A beer please, Woody.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

Vivian: Nice outfit.

Elle: Oh, I like your outfit too, except when I dress up as a frigid bitch, I try not to look so constipated.

(1976 – ) American actress & producer
Insults TV/Movie Quotes