Subject: TV/Movie Quotes (Page 8)

Any dog under fifty pounds is a cat and cats are useless.

(1970 – ) American actor, writer & carpenter
Animals Dogs TV/Movie Quotes

If women don't find you handsome they should at least find you handy.

(1945 – ) Canadian comedian & actor
People TV/Movie Quotes Women

The Lord descend down a thundervolt.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

I wore flowers in my hair and meditated for hours on end. I was finding God all over the place… He kept ditching me.

(1938 – ) American actor
God TV/Movie Quotes

Lemon merinj pie.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes

I never saw a dame yet that didn’t understand a good slap in the mouth or a slug from a .45.

(1936 – ) American stage, film & television actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Well, look who penetrated the inner-circle. And then he stuck around and married her.

(1958 – ) American actress & singer
TV/Movie Quotes

Fred Sanford: I still want to sow some wild oats.

Lamont: At your age, you don’t have no wild oats, you got shredded wheat.

(1946 – ) American actor
Sex TV/Movie Quotes

I’ll see you at the opera tonight. I’ll hold your seat till you get there. After you get there you’re on your own.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
TV/Movie Quotes

If I’m not back in five minutes… just wait longer.

(1962 – ) Canadian-American actor & comedian
Time TV/Movie Quotes

Howard: It was an hour ago, Sheldon. A Jew sits in front of a house in Texas for that long, for sale signs start to go up.

(1980 – ) American actor, comedian & musician
Time TV/Movie Quotes

Go ahead and play the blues if it'll make you happy.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Music TV/Movie Quotes

Beverly LaSalle: I'm a transvestite.

Edith Bunker: Could've fooled me; you ain't even got no accent.

(1923 – 2013) American actress
Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

Wealthy men are never old.

(1924 – 2014) American actress & model
TV/Movie Quotes

Why go out for milk when you've got a cow at home.

(1946 – ) American actor
Marriage Sex TV/Movie Quotes

Aunt Esther: Who you calling ugly, sucker?

Fred: I’m calling you ugly, I could push our face in some dough and make gorilla cookies.

(1922 – 1991) American comedian
Appearance TV/Movie Quotes Ugly

I think I've figured this balloon thing out, Marge. It can go up and down, but not side to side or back in time.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Things TV/Movie Quotes

Oh my God, how can you drink straight orange juice first thing in the morning?

(1958 – ) American actress & singer
Alcohol Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

Enough, if I wanted intelligent conversation, I’d still be dating my teachers.

(1971 – ) American actress
TV/Movie Quotes

No, I think that was when Abraham Lincoln signed the Declaration of Independence. Ya know, “Fourscore and seven years ago.”

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

In the wake of the killing of Osama bin Laden President Obama’s approval rating jumped to 56 percent, his highest in two years… which shows there is literally nothing he can do to please the other 44 percent.

(1973 – ) American comedian, actor & television host
Politics TV/Movie Quotes