Subject: Work » Occupations (Page 3)

You think when gym teachers are younger, they’re thinking, “You know, I want to teach, but I don’t want to read?”

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor
Education Occupations Work

Barber: A brilliant conversationalist who cuts hair for a sideline.

Conversation Definitions Occupations

Lawyers are operators of the toll bridge which anyone in search of justice must pass.

(1939 – ) American financial journalist
Lawyers Occupations

Critics are to authors what dogs are to lamp-posts.

(1945 – ) American author
Occupations Work

Being a reporter is as much a diagnosis as a job description.

(1953 – ) American author, journalist & opinion columnist
Occupations Work

Seven months ago I could give a single command and 541,000 people would immediately obey it; today I can’t get a plumber to come to my house.

(1934 – 2012) United States Army general
Occupations Success Work

Historians: People who won’t let bygones be bygones.

Definitions History Occupations Time

A professional is one who does a good job even when he doesn't feel like it.

Murphy’s Laws Occupations Work

The first requirement of a statesman is that he be dull.


(1893 – 1971) American statesman & lawyer
Government Occupations Work

Sailors ought never to go to church; they ought to go to hell, where it is much more comfortable.

(1866 – 1946) English author
Occupations Work

Statistician: One who knows which numbers to use in any eventuality.

Definitions Occupations

Manicurist: A girl who makes money hand over fist.

Definitions Occupations Work

Faustino the Great: How long you study music?
Mr. Lyons: Fifteen years.
Faustino the Great: Fifteen? … You know, two more years, you could’ve been a plumber.

(1887 – 1961) comedian, actor & member of the Marx Brothers
Occupations TV/Movie Quotes

The chief distinction of a diplomat is that he can say no in such a way that it sounds like yes.

(1897 – 1972) Canadian prime minister
Government Occupations Work

The Lord taught me to love everybody, but the last ones I learned to love were the sportswriters.

(1922 – ) American baseball player & manager
Baseball Occupations Sports Work

Electrician: A person who wires for money.

Definitions Occupations Work

Tailor: An occupation that suits everyone.

Definitions Occupations Work

In California everyone goes to a therapist, is a therapist , or is a therapist going to a therapist.

(1924 – 1984) American author
Occupations People Places Work

My girlfriend likes to play doctor; so I always make her wait 90 minutes before I see her.

(1952 – ) American comedian & actor
Occupations Sex

Archaeologist: A person whose career lies in ruins.

Definitions Occupations Wordplay

Hardening and Tempering Engineers’ Tools

Book Titles Occupations Work