Subject: Work » Occupations (Page 4)

Toughest job I ever had: selling doors, door to door.

(1970 – ) American comedian & television game show host
Occupations Things Work

Forever poised between a cliche and an indiscretion.

(1894 – 1986) British prime minister
Government Occupations Work

The faults of the burglar are qualities of the financier.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Occupations Work

One thing about being a cabbie is that you don’t have to worry about being fired from a good job.

(1935 – ) American actor
Occupations TV/Movie Quotes Work

You know I'm the only Iraqi comedian… yeah true… at least that makes us three more than Germany.

(1965 – ) British-Iranian comedian, actor & writer
Entertainment Occupations People Places Work

Dentist: A collector of old magazines.

Definitions Occupations

99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Government Lawyers Occupations Work

I think that’s what they call professional courtesy.

(1897 – 1953) American writer & producer
Occupations

School teachers are not fully appreciated by parents until it rains all day Saturday.

Education Occupations Work

Diplomat: A headwaiter who is allowed to sit down occasionally. 

(1921 – 2004) English actor & author
Government Occupations

Dentist: man who lives from hand to mouth.

Definitions Occupations

Every woman should marry an archaeologist because she grows increasingly attractive to him as she grows increasingly to resemble a ruin.

(1890 – 1976) British crime writer of novels, short stories & plays
Appearance Occupations Work

The only difference between a “hair stylist” and a regular barber is the price.

Occupations Work

An economist is someone who, on being shown something that works in practice, wonders if it would work in theory.

(1911 – 2004) 40th U.S. president & actor
Occupations Work

When I was a kid I used to play doctor with this little girl in my neighborhood and one time we got caught… luckily, it was a Wednesday and we were just playing golf.

comedian
Doctors Occupations Work

People were laughing at me anyway, so I thought “F**k it, I might as well start charging them.”

(1975 – ) English comedian
Occupations Work

The difference between a chef and a cook is the difference between a wife and a prostitute; cooks do meals for people they know and love, chefs do it anonymously for anyone who’s got the price.

(1954 – ) British writer & critic
Cooking Food/Drink Occupations Work

Clergyman: A ticket speculator outside the gates of Heaven.

Beliefs Definitions Occupations

Don't pay any attention to the critics; don't even ignore them.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Misspokements Occupations Opinion

Easiest job in the world of course, Australian psychiatrist, “Gday Gday… how you doing… no worries next.”

(1964 – ) English comedian
Occupations Places Work

Madam: Someone for whom the belles toil.

Definitions Occupations