Subject: Work (Page 18)

In any human enterprise, work seeks the lowest hierarchical level.

Murphy’s Laws Work

Job: A state of employment everyone wants but few look forward to on a Monday morning.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions Work

Actuary: Someone who cannot stand the excitement of chartered accountancy.

Occupations Work

The only reason people work for airlines is because the Nazi party is no longer hiring.

(1983 – ) American comedian
Occupations Work

The first mistake in public business is going into it.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Work

Freelance: To collect unemployment.

Definitions Work

I used to work at a factory where they made hydrants; but you couldn't park anywhere near the place.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Autos Things Work

Writing is the hardest way of earning a living, with the possible exception of wrestling alligators.

(1918 - 2002) American author
Communication Occupations Reading/Writing Work

The speed of exit of a civil servant is directly proportional to the quality of his service.

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Work

People come to this country from all over the world to pursue their dreams of driving a taxi or selling hot dogs or working in a sweatshop.

(1965 – 2010) American stand-up comedian & television personality
America Places Work

A good farmer is nothing more nor less than a handy man with a sense of humus.

(1899 – 1985) US author & humorist
Work

I have long been of the opinion that if work were such a splendid thing the rich would have kept more of it for themselves.

(1940 – ) English politician
Work

When a great many people are unable to find work, unemployment results.

(1872 – 1933) 30th U.S. president
Misspokements Work

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking.

(1915 – 1977) columnist, writer & actor
Autos Occupations People Situations Women Work

Doing nothing is very hard to do… you never know when you're finished.

(1926 – 2010) Canadian actor
Work

Well, we can't stand about here doing nothing; people will think we're workmen.

(1918 – 2002) Irish comedian, writer, musician, poet & playwright
Work

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot; finish last in medical school and they call you doctor.

(1922 – 2002) American college basketball coach
Doctors Health Occupations Sports Work

Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion.

Murphy’s Laws Time Work

The only problem with having nothing to do is you can't stop and rest.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Problems Situations Work

My first job consisted of me answering a phone… but it wasn't for me.

British comedian
Occupations Self Work

Assembly Line: The notion that if a job is worth doing, it’s worth repeating 9,614 times a day.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions Work