Subject: Work (Page 3)

Manager: Someone who doesn’t know how to do your job, who tells you how to do your job.

Teaching has ruined more American novelists than drink.

(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter

Boss: A person who comes early to see who comes late.

Auctioneer: The man who proclaims with a hammer that he has picked a pocket with his tongue.

Masochism is a valuable job skill.

(1962 – ) writer & journalist

The only problem with having nothing to do is you can't stop and rest.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist

Manicurist: A girl who makes money hand over fist.

I am not the editor of a newspaper and shall always try to do right and be good so that God will not make me one.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist

I want everyone to tell me the truth, even if it costs him his job.

(1879 – 1974) film producer

The world is full of willing people; some willing to work, the rest willing to let them.

(1874 – 1963) American poet

The one who says it can’t be done shouldn’t interrupt the one doing it.

Nothing motivates a man more than to see his boss putting in an honest day’s work.

Baker: A person who kneads the dough.

I'll never forget the time they gave me a farewell party at work. I was so surprised – I didn't even know I was fired.

comedian

Consultant: A jobless person who shows executives how to work.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter

A homeless guy asked me for 2 pounds, so I gave him 1.67 because that’s what a woman would get paid for doing the same job.

British comedian

Work: An unpopular way to earn money.

Taxi Driver: Worker who earns a living by driving customers away.

You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director

Historians are like deaf people who go on answering questions that no one has asked them.

(1828 – 1910) Russian writer

Nurses: Patient people.