Author: Anonymous Page 10

Major: Area of study that no longer interests you.

Definitions Education Learning

Sleeping dogs bark the loudest.

Mixed metaphors

An Irishman is not drunk as long as he still has a blade of grass to hang onto.

Alcohol Food/Drink People

Marching to the beat of a dead horse

Mixed metaphors

The flood damage was so bad they had to evaporate the city.

Malaprops

“I’m just an ordinary soldier,” Tom admitted privately.

Tom Swifties

Diamond: One of the hardest substances known to man – especially the payments on one.

Definitions Things

“I’ve dug myself into a hole,” Tom said gravely.

Tom Swifties

He goes to church on Sunday, steals chickens on Monday.

Beliefs Expressions Honesty

Jack Benny played Mendelsson last night… Mendelsson lost.

Entertainment Music

Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.

Emotions Love Marriage

It was so cold… we didn't clean the house – we just defrosted it.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

Loved Ben, hated Hur.

Reviews/Criticism

Infant Prodigies: Young people with highly imaginative parents.

Children Definitions Family

Woman: A creature who is either making a fool out of man, or making a man out of a fool.

Definitions People

Ambassador: An honest man sent to lie abroad for the good of his country.

Definitions

Absence makes a long story short.

Mixed metaphors

Statistician: One who knows which numbers to use in any eventuality.

Definitions Occupations

It was so cold… we had lunch at the "Greasy Spoon" – just for the heartburn.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

From now on, I’m watching everything you do with a fine-tuned comb.

Mixed metaphors

Whether the glass is half-full or half empty, depends on whether you are drinking or pouring.

Situations