Author: Anonymous Page 101

Creditor: A man who has a better memory than a debtor.

Definitions

X Chromosome: Sex chromosome responsible for the desire of dust ruffles, pillow shams, potpourris soap operas and ballroom dancing.

Definitions People Women

Brilliant sunshine rained down on the city.

Misspokements Mixed metaphors

Nothing is so fallacious as facts, except figures.

Beliefs Facts

Bargain Hunter: One who is often led astray by false profits.

Activities Definitions Shopping

Censorship: The power of the suppress.

Communication Wordplay

Well, that's a feather in your pocket.

Mixed metaphors

Sarcasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the recipient who doesn’t get it.

Communication Definitions

They'll have to retaliate the vote.

Malaprops

Armor: The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.

Clothing Definitions

“Don’t you love sleeping outdoors,” Tom said intently.

Tom Swifties

Four-wheel Drive: Getting stuck in more inaccessible places.

Definitions

Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.

Alcohol Food/Drink Health Life

Good Old Days: What people fifty years hence will be calling the present time.

Definitions Past Time

Quality Control: The process of testing one out of every 1,000 units coming off a production line to make sure that at least one out of 100 works.

Definitions

Like all self-made men he worships his creator.

Insults Reviews/Criticism

Microsoft™ is thoroughly dropping the ball on that front.

Mixed metaphors

“I’m waiting to see the doctor,” said Tom patiently.

Tom Swifties

They think they can do the portrait in one setting.

Malaprops

She tried to use reverse psychiatry on me.

Malaprops

She's tall enough to go duck huntin' with a rake.

Appearance Body Expressions