Author: Anonymous Page 109

“That’s especially stupid!” said Tom superciliously.

Tom Swifties

Home: A place where man goes to raise a fuss because something went wrong at the office.

Definitions Places

“Hurry up and get to the back of the ship!” Tom said sternly.

Tom Swifties

A man doesn’t know the value of a woman’s love until he starts paying alimony.

Marriage

He breathes through his nose to keep from wearing out his teeth.

Expressions Frugal

“I’m waiting to see the doctor,” said Tom patiently.

Tom Swifties

We certainly don't want to rock the apple cart.

Mixed metaphors

Antique: An item your grandparents bought, your parents got rid of,  and you're buying again.

Definitions Things

Virus: A Latin medical term meaning, “Your guess is as good as mine.”

Definitions Health

You are so lazy if you had a third hand, you’d need a third pocket to put it in.

Characteristics Expressions

Some people sail through life on a bed of roses like a knife slicing through butter.

Mixed metaphors

It will have a special time on our plate.

Misspokements

Impotence: Nature’s way of saying “No Hard Feelings.”

Definitions Sex

Good Advice: What a man gives when he gets too old to set a bad example.

Beliefs Definitions Opinion

No skin off my teeth.

Mixed metaphors

This is an awfully big elephant to eat.

Mixed metaphors

If you know you don't know much, you are smarter than most people.

Intelligence

Don’t bite the hand that looks dirty.

Mixed metaphors

Boat: A hole in the water surrounded by wood into which one pours money.

Definitions Things

Race Track: Where thousands of people can get taken for a ride on the same horse.

Definitions

It's like pulling hen's teeth.

Mixed metaphors