Author: Anonymous Page 11

“That’s nothing!” said Tom naughtily.

Tom Swifties

Don't count your chickens until you see the whites of their eyes.

Mixed metaphors

Liberal: A man with his mind open at both ends.

Beliefs Definitions People

“No ellipses, parabolas or hyperbolas,” said Tom laconically.

Tom Swifties

Armadillo: Possum on the half shell.

Animals Definitions

Whoa!: A brake for horses.

Animals Definitions

Tact: The ability to describe others as they see themselves.

Communication Definitions

Flirt: A girl who got the boy you wanted.

Definitions

Yogurt: Semi-solid dairy product made from partially evaporated and fermented milk. Yogurt is one of only three foods that taste exactly the same as they sound. The other two being goulash and squid.

Definitions Food/Drink

Accident: A thing that is caused by people, but often causes people.

Accidents Definitions Problems

A drunkard is like a whiskey-bottle, all neck and belly and no head.

Alcohol Food/Drink

Biting the hand that rocks the cradle

Mixed metaphors

Argument: A discussion where two people try to get the last word in first

Definitions

It's a big nut to swallow.

Mixed metaphors

People were streaming out of town to escape the floods.

Mixed metaphors

Fitness: Salvation through perspiration.

Definitions

Expert: Any person who has tried and failed – and can tell you why.

Definitions

At twenty, we don’t care what the world thinks of us; at thirty, we worry about what it’s thinking of us; at forty, we discover it isn’t thinking about us at all.

Age Intelligence

Easy: Used to describe a woman who has the sexual morals of a man.

Definitions People Sex Women

“I wouldn’t like anything but just that,” said Tom wantonly.

Tom Swifties

Monogamy leaves a lot to be desired.

Marriage