Author: Anonymous Page 111

I like a lot of partisan cheese on my pizza.

Food/Drink Malaprops

He was bothered mentally mainly by the physical plague.

Mixed metaphors

“I got demoted,” Tom admitted privately.

Tom Swifties

Absolute Pitch: Completely dark.

Definitions

Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her own way.

Definitions Marriage

Historians: People who won’t let bygones be bygones.

Definitions History Occupations Time

Now that the ball is in our court, let's go for the touchdown.

Mixed metaphors

Flirtation: Paying attention without intention.

Definitions

I’m just talking out loud.

Mixed metaphors

Creativity: The sudden cessation of stupidity.

Definitions Intelligence

People have the persona that all Texans wear cowboy hats.

Beliefs Malaprops Opinion

Strip Poker: A game in which the more you lose the more you have to show for it.

Activities Definitions

Virus: A Latin medical term meaning, “Your guess is as good as mine.”

Definitions Health

My husband and I have a monotonous relationship.

Malaprops Relationships

Counsel: Advice with a price tag.

Definitions

I wouldn't touch the metric measuring system with a 3.048m pole.

Language Science/Weather

He’s still green behind the ears.

Mixed metaphors

“This way to the seabird exhibit”, said Tom awkwardly.

Tom Swifties

What is the probability that something will happen according to the odds?

Uncategorized

Impossible Lie: In golf, a ball that is in a position that is both completely obstructed by an immovable object and continuously observed by an incorruptible player.

Definitions Golf Sports

He reads like a fish.

Mixed metaphors