Author: Anonymous Page 121

Agnostic: A person who says that he knows nothing about God and, when you agree with him, he becomes angry.

Beliefs Definitions God

“I can’t march any more!” the soldier called haltingly.

Tom Swifties

Nurses: Patient people.

Definitions Health Occupations

Logic: The art of going wrong with confidence.

Definitions

She’s not the toughest cookie on the block.

Mixed metaphors

“2 bdrm furn w 5 appl”, said Tom aptly.

Tom Swifties

As Bob is my witless

Malaprops

At least you are not obnoxious like so many other people – you are obnoxious in a different and worse way!

Characteristics People

Beyond the question of a doubt

Mixed metaphors

Average: The poorest of the good and the best of the bad.

Definitions

Abash: A high school graduation party.

Definitions

Umpire: The original strike arbitrator.

Definitions Wordplay

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Communication Language

Intelligent conversationalist: One who nods his head in agreement while you’re talking.

Communication Conversation Definitions Intelligence Speech

I guess I threw a cog in the wrench.

Mixed metaphors

Sleeping Bag: A nap sack.

Activities Definitions Sleep

“I’ve struck oil!” said Tom crudely.

Tom Swifties

I'm feeling lack-a-daisy today.

Malaprops

Politician: One who is willing to do anything on earth for the workers except become one.

Definitions Government Politicians

“It’s a unit of electric current,” said Tom amply.

Tom Swifties

Spare the rod, spoil the broth.

Mixed metaphors