Author: Anonymous Page 125

A Canadian is sort of like an American, but without the gun.

America Arms Conflict People Places

Aversion: One side of a disputed story.

Definitions

Slander: To lie, or tell the truth, about someone.

Communication Definitions

Is this a whole nother bucket of worms?

Mixed metaphors

Mr. and Mrs. John Smith request your presents at the marriage of their daughter…

Malaprops

Aren't you ever tired of having yourself around?

Insults

Democracy: A system whereby the person who never votes can cuss out the man the other people elected.

Definitions Democracy Elections/Voting Government

Ugly as a moose chewin ice

Appearance Expressions Ugly

“I suppose I’ll have to write my name again,” said Tom resignedly.

Tom Swifties

A dirty book is rarely dusty.

Books Communication Reading/Writing Sex

Doctor: Someone who practices medicine but charges as if he knew.

Definitions Doctors Health

“I can see through the window,” said Tom stiltedly.

Tom Swifties

If you are riding a high horse, there ain’t no way to get down off it gracefully.

Characteristics

Acme: Spots on the top of your head.

Definitions

He swept the rug under the carpet.

Mixed metaphors

A drunkard is like a whiskey-bottle, all neck and belly and no head.

Alcohol Food/Drink

To make the drawers work better, rub them with paraphernalia.

Malaprops

“I admire East End gangsters,” said Tom crazily.

Tom Swifties

“Pretend we were in the days before railways,” Tom coached.

Tom Swifties

Girdle: The difference between fact and figure.

Appearance Body Clothing Definitions

What’s needed in government is more horse sense and less nonsense.

Government