Author: Anonymous Page 130

Karma: Justice without the feeling of satisfaction.

Definitions

“For what we are about to receive, may the Lord make us truly thankful,” said Tom gracefully.

Tom Swifties

The greatest thing since sliced beer.

Mixed metaphors

Users: Computer users are divided into three types: Novice users: people who are afraid that simply pressing a key might break their computer. Intermediate users: people who don't know how to fix their computer after they've just pressed a key that broke it. Expert users: people who break other people's computers.

Computers Definitions People Things

“This looks like the fruit of the blackthorn,” said Tom slowly.

Tom Swifties

Synonym: A word you use when you can’t spell the other word.

Definitions Language

“I see,” said Tom icily.

Tom Swifties

Bore: A person who has nothing to say and says it.

Definitions

She is going to join the gym to lose some weights.

Activities Exercise Misspokements

Sympathy: What one usually gives to a friend or relative when he doesn’t want to lend him money.

Definitions Emotions

“Hey, you’re on my foot!” said Tom standoffishly.

Tom Swifties

Blind Date: When you expect to meet a vision and he turns out to be a sight.

Dating Definitions Relationships

Broom: Witch craft.

Definitions

Quartet: Four men, all of whom think that the other three can’t sing.

Definitions Entertainment

I'm busier than a stump full of ants.

Activities Situations

“I have to wear this cast for another six weeks,” said Tom disjointedly.

Tom Swifties

Damp weather is very hard on the sciences.

Malaprops

God is not dead but alive and working on a much less ambitious project.

Beliefs God

Impregnable: A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.

Definitions Sex

Quadruplets: Four crying out loud.

Children Definitions Wordplay

The only man who can fool all the women all the time is a fashion designer.

Appearance Clothing People Women