Author: Anonymous Page 135

Looks like he’s been sortin’ wildcats.

Appearance Expressions

Youth: That brief period, as distinguished from childhood or middle age, when the sexes talk to each other at a party.

Age Definitions People Young

Luxury Resort: One where a waiter expects a $2 tip when he presents a $6 bill for serving a $3.50 bottle of beer.

Definitions

Economist: A man who knows more about money than the people who have it.

Definitions Occupations People

Impotent: Willy-nilly.

Definitions Sex

It’s the best thing since sliced Spam.

Mixed metaphors

Parents: The one thing children wear out faster than shoes.

Definitions Family Parents

“Another plate of seafood for me!” Tom clamored.

Tom Swifties

Hotter than a depot stove

Expressions Science/Weather

Good Sport: One who will always let you have your own way.

Definitions

Nervous as a cat in a room full of rockers

Characteristics Emotions Expressions

Good punctuation means not to be late.

Malaprops Time

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.

Housework Work

Divorce: Going through a change of wife.

Definitions Divorce Marriage

Linguist: A person who can be misunderstood in many languages.

Communication Definitions Language

Honeymoon: The vacation a man takes before starting to work for a new boss.

Definitions Marriage

She is so stupid… she can’t make ice without a recipe.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

Electric Eel: Fish that thrives in strong currents.

Animals Definitions

“I can’t be bothered,” said Tom carelessly.

Tom Swifties

Pickpocket: A man who believes that every crowd has a silver lining.

Crime Definitions

Caramel: A substance for extracting children’s teeth.

Definitions Food/Drink