Author: Anonymous Page 137

Education is what survives when what has been learnt has been forgotten.

Education Learning Memory

Compromise: A deal in which two people get what neither of them wanted.

Definitions

If you teach a snake to fish, you can lead it to water but it won't drink..

Mixed metaphors

Realtor: A man with lots to sell.

Definitions Occupations Wordplay

Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it.

Intelligence Memory

The wages of sin are unreported.

Government Taxes

Showoff: A child who is more talented than yours.

Children Definitions Family

Tact: The ability to describe others as they see themselves.

Definitions

“Who goes there!” the soldier called out haltingly.

Tom Swifties

Statistician: One who knows which numbers to use in any eventuality.

Definitions Occupations

America: A nation that conceives many odd inventions for getting somewhere but can think of nothing to do when it gets there.

America Definitions Places

Chiropractor: A doctor who works his fingers to the bone… yours.

Definitions Doctors

Small Town: A place where everybody knows the troubles you’ve seen.

Definitions Places

“Don’t give me the gears!” said Tom automatically.

Tom Swifties

Rejoinder: Married his ex.

Definitions Marriage

Till the cows freeze over.

Mixed metaphors

“Once again, I read it on Wikipedia,” Tom recited.

Tom Swifties

Know-it-all: One who pretends to know something about everything but really knows nothing about anything.

Definitions

Minor Operation: One performed on someone else.

Definitions Health

Y Chromosome: A line of genes designed for men only.

Definitions Men People

Philosophers: People who talk about something they don’t understand, and make you think it’s your fault.

Definitions Intelligence People