Author: Anonymous Page 137

There is no halftime for cheerleaders!

Activities Sports

School teachers are not fully appreciated by parents until it rains all day Saturday.

Education Occupations Work

Anything worth taking seriously is worth making fun of.

Communication

We all have our own legs to pull.

Mixed metaphors

Etiquette: Learning to yawn with your mouth closed.

Definitions

Efficiency Expert: A man who knows less about your business than you do and gets paid more for telling you how to run it than you could possibly make out of it, even if you ran it right instead of the way he told you to.

Definitions

We can still hang our heads high.

Mixed metaphors

Foreign Aid: The transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries.

Definitions

“There must be a power cut,” said Tom delightedly.

Tom Swifties

Adolescent: One who is well informed about anything he doesn’t have to study.

Definitions

Quadruplets: Four crying out loud.

Children Definitions Wordplay

Don't beat a dead horse in the mouth.

Mixed metaphors

He is so dumb, blondes tell jokes about him.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

I want to see you go to town like a house of fire.

Mixed metaphors

“I’m shocked,” said Tom electrically.

Tom Swifties

Immorality: The morality of those who are having a better time.

Definitions

A waist is a terrible thing to mind.

Appearance Body Fat

Our ship was caught in a typhoid.

Malaprops

He is so fat… his high school graduation picture was an aerial photograph.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

He's so thin he had to stand twice in the same place to make a shadow.

Miscellaneous

Spinster: A lady in waiting.

Definitions People Women