Author: Anonymous Page 143

Dermatologist: Person who makes rash judgments.

Definitions Doctors Health

The only thing wrong with being an atheist is that there's nobody to talk to during an orgasm.

Beliefs God Sex

Foosball: A combination of soccer and shish kabobs.

Activities Definitions

I have taken many of God's blessings for granite.

Malaprops

She’s a tall drink of water.

Appearance Body Expressions

Window: A looking-out glass.

Definitions Things

If you spill the beans, then you'll open a can of worms.

Mixed metaphors

Mason-Dixon Line: A geographical division between “you all” and “youse guys.”

Definitions Places

“Yes, I’m amazingly strongly built,” said Tom soberly.

Tom Swifties

[a rock group’s] authenticity strikes a chord with fans.

Mixed metaphors

Men are like chocolate bars: sweet, smooth, and heading straight for your hips.

Food/Drink Men People

Those people all corregated over there.

Malaprops

When all is said and done, more is said than done.

Communication Speech

Diplomat: A person who can juggle a hot potato long enough for it to become a cold issue.

Definitions

“I like camping,” said Tom intently.

Tom Swifties

It is so hot… the cows arre giving evaporated milk.

Exaggerations Heat Science/Weather

We're going to get locked into a corner.

Mixed metaphors

Church: Man’s effort to keep a roof over God’s head.

Beliefs Definitions God

Hell hath no fury like a wet cat.

Mixed metaphors

A duck on a hot tin roof.

Mixed metaphors

I want to see you go to town like a house of fire.

Mixed metaphors