Author: Anonymous Page 147

Fishing: A venerable contest in which modern man pits his intelligence and technology against the native wit of primitive aquatic vertebrates, and generally finishes second.

Activities Definitions

Many a man fails as an original thinker simply because his memory is too good.

Intelligence Memory Wisdom

State-Of-The-Art: Soon-to-be-obsolete.

Definitions

Y Chromosome: A line of genes designed for men only.

Definitions Men People

“Oops! There goes my hat!” said Tom off the top of his head.

Tom Swifties

Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by an occasional miracle.

Golf Sports

The success of any venture will be helped by prayer, even in the wrong denomination.

Beliefs Murphy’s Laws Success

Take it with a grain assault.

Malaprops

It will be music to your wallet.

Mixed metaphors

“Everything Albert says is so obvious”, said Tom altruistically.

Tom Swifties

A stitch in time is worth a pound of cure.

Mixed metaphors

It's a long road to hoe

Malaprops

“I have no underwear,” Tom said expansively.

Tom Swifties

A stitch in time saves a poke in the eye with a wet fish.

Mixed metaphors

“Is it true that some animals will eat their own babies?” asked Tom literately.

Tom Swifties

“This blood-sucking insect likes French cheese,” said Tom briefly.

Tom Swifties

Infant Prodigies: Young people with highly imaginative parents.

Children Definitions Family

Fiddler: A violinist before he becomes the virtuoso.

Definitions Entertainment Music

“I always eat at McDonald’s”, said Tom archly.

Tom Swifties

Alarm clock: An instrument used to wake up people who have no kids.

Children Definitions Family Things

That's the whole kettle of fish in a nutshell.

Mixed metaphors