Author: Anonymous Page 151

It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them.

Family Planning: The art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster.

Fable: A story told by a teenager arriving home after curfew.

Stirred the sea into a bowl of boiling cauldron

It's hotter than the hinges on the gates of hell.

“I’m swimming in the middle of Paris!” shouted Tom insanely.

We're going to get locked into a corner.

“Cut it out!” said Tom sharply.

It's bad luck to be superstitious.

Old Age: When you find yourself using one bend-over to pick up two things.

When all is said and done, more is said than done.

Numismatics: Collecting money for fun.

Small Town: A place where nothing happens every minute.

Expert: A person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field.

He’s so lazy he wouldn’t work in a pie factory.

Genealogy: An account of one’s descent from an ancestor who did not particularly care to trace his own.

Drug: A substance that, when injected into a guinea pig, produces a scientific paper.

Boy: A noise with dirt on it.

He was from Thailand or some other erotic place.

“I wonder if there’s a number between seven and nine,” said Tom considerately.

Can a one-legged duck swim in a circle?