Author: Anonymous Page 153

Time rolled up like a scroll, while the plague nibbled at the edges of their years.

Mixed metaphors

Wrinkles: Something other people have… you have character lines.

Appearance Body Definitions

Exhaustion: Sufficient cause for the hospitalization of a celebrity – the normal state of existence for the rest of the working world.

Definitions

Camp: A place in the country where a mother sends her children for her vacation.

Definitions Places

Bank Robber: A guy who gets alarmed easily.

Definitions

“We can’t accommodate any more peripherals,” said Tom bus-ily.

Tom Swifties

Spilt Milk: Udder waste.

Definitions Food/Drink Wordplay

There was a young man from Peru

Whose limericks stopped at line two.

Communication Wordplay

He’s a wolf in cheap clothing.

Malaprops

Budget: An attempt to live below your yearnings.

Definitions

Hit the wall running…

Mixed metaphors

I'm happier than a woodpecker in a lumber yard.

Miscellaneous

”..,” said Tom blankly.

Tom Swifties

Never put all your eggs in one omelet.

Mixed metaphors

It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them.

Autos Intelligence Stupidity Things

“Ought I to do this?” asked Tom with a shudder.

Tom Swifties

The faster a computer is, the faster it will reach a crashed state.

Computers Failure Murphy’s Laws Things

Laziness: The habit of resting before you get tired.

Characteristics Definitions

Jealousy: The tribute mediocrity pays to genius.

Characteristics Definitions

Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.

Emotions Love Marriage

The Norwegian language has been described as German spoken underwater.

Communication Language Places