Author: Anonymous Page 156

It sticks out like a sore throat.

Mixed metaphors

“Some day, people will be able to file lawsuits against computers,” said Tom soothingly.

Tom Swifties

“It’s only average,” said Tom meanly.

Tom Swifties

Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your mouth is moving.

Communication Education Learning Speech

I can read him like the back of my book.

Mixed metaphors

Narcissist: Psychoanalytic term for the person who loves himself more than his analyst.

Definitions People Self

Tact: The ability to arrive at conclusions without expressing them.

Definitions

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

Beliefs People

College: A fountain of knowledge where students gather to drink.

Definitions Education School

Multitasking means screwing up several things at once.

Mistakes Problems

Cemetery: A place people are dying to get into.

Definitions

The success of any venture will be helped by prayer, even in the wrong denomination.

Beliefs Murphy’s Laws Success

If winners never quit, and quitters never win, what idiot came up with quit while you're ahead?

People Situations

The discovery of the preserved bodies “breathed new life into” Arctic exploration.

Mixed metaphors

Synonym: A word you use when you can’t spell the other word.

Definitions Language

The reason they call if ‘golf’ is that all the other four-letter words were used up.

Golf Sports

Gentleman Farmer: One who has more hay in the bank thank in the barn.

Definitions

Fad: Something that goes in one era and out the other.

Definitions

Marriage: The mourning after the knot before.

Definitions Marriage

Life: A continuous series of disasters which result in one’s death.

Death Definitions Life

English Channel: The BBC.

Definitions Entertainment Television