Author: Anonymous Page 24

Contraceptives: What Protestants use on all conceivable occasions.

Definitions

Vacation: A period during which people find out where to stay away from next year.

Definitions

The most dangerous killer in the animals of crime.

Malaprops

“I’m swimming in the middle of Paris!” shouted Tom insanely.

Tom Swifties

It's so far removed, it goes right over our heads.

Mixed metaphors

She has extra-century perception.

Malaprops

The head of the body overseeing youth justice…

Mixed metaphors

Wild whores could not drag me away.

Malaprops

A lot of good arguments are spoiled by some fool who knows what he’s talking about.

Intelligence

Psychology: The care of the id by the odd.

Definitions Health Science/Weather

Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?

Expressions Marriage

Do you follow where I'm coming from?

Mixed metaphors Understanding

District of Columbia: A territory bounded on all sides by the United States of America.

Definitions Places

Are you getting the jest of this?

Malaprops

Bisexual: A person who pays for sex.

Definitions

improvise

Tom Swifties

He’s not the one with his ass in a noose.

Mixed metaphors

Diplomacy: The ability to take something and make the other fellow believe he is giving it away.

Definitions

Definition: A statement intended to put a word in its place.

Communication Definitions Language

Some people sail through life on a bed of roses like a knife slicing through butter.

Mixed metaphors

Automobile: A payment plan on wheels.

Autos Definitions Things