Author: Anonymous Page 24

Calendar: An attempt, underwritten by the principal religions, to make the heavenly bodies keep regular hours.

Definitions

I guess I threw a cog in the wrench.

Mixed metaphors

We should get our foot in the door and get the ball rolling.

Mixed metaphors

Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff.

Things

“Some day, people will be able to file lawsuits against computers,” said Tom soothingly.

Tom Swifties

Life: A play with a lousy third act.

Definitions Life

Life: Coming into the world wit nothing, leaving with nothing and, in between, giving everything to the IRS.

Definitions Life Taxes

Business Lunch: Lunch.

Definitions Food/Drink

That’s a kettle of fish of a different color.

Mixed metaphors

“This salmon is excellent,” said Tom superficially.

Tom Swifties

We are proud to be part of a ground-breaking initiative.

Mixed metaphors

“I can see because I have actual visual organs,” Tom realized.

Tom Swifties

She is so ugly… when she gets up, the sun goes down.

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

Once the toothpaste is out of the tube, it's too late to close the barn door.

Mixed metaphors

Friends: There are two kinds of friends – those who are around when you need them, and those who are around when they need you.

Definitions Friends People

“The stock market’s going up,” said Tom bullishly.

Tom Swifties

Keep your ear to the grapevine.

Mixed metaphors

That room was so small you couldn’t cuss a cat without gettting fur in your mouth!

Expressions

Psychology: The care of the id by the odd.

Definitions Health Science/Weather

Nursery: Bawl room.

Definitions

Dust: Mud with the juice squeezed out.

Definitions