Author: Anonymous Page 24

Bus Driver: A person who tells people where to get off.

Activities Definitions Driving Occupations

English Channel: The BBC.

Definitions Entertainment Television

“I wouldn’t mind going with you to the tennis match,” she said gamely.

Tom Swifties

Executive Suite: A sugar daddy.

Definitions

Expert: A person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field.

Definitions

“Everything in Texas is bigger,” he said in measured tones; “Even the cowboys,” he continued hoarsely.

Tom Swifties

Just keep your eye on the pie.

Malaprops

Can a one-legged duck swim in a circle?

Expressions

It's got lots of installation.

Appearance Clothing Malaprops

These two guys are cut out of the same mold.

Mixed metaphors

A sandwich is an attempt to make both ends meat.

Food/Drink

Armor: A knight gown.

Clothing Definitions

Executive: A person who can take two hours for lunch without anybody missing him.

Definitions Occupations

“I wrote the book on that subject”, said Tom authoritatively.

Tom Swifties

Just when you see the light at the end of the tunnel, the roof caves in!

Situations

I look like I was sent for and couldn’t go.

Appearance

“We can’t accommodate any more peripherals,” said Tom bus-ily.

Tom Swifties

Castration: A eunuch experience.

Definitions Wordplay

Government Deficit: The difference between the amount of money the government spends and the amount it has the nerve to collect.

Definitions Government

Small Town: Where everybody is interested in what the Joneses will name the latest baby, while a big city is where they worry about what the zoo will call the new elephant.

Definitions Places

Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her own way.

Definitions Marriage