Author: Anonymous Page 25

Once again, the Achilles' heel has reared its ugly head.

Mixed metaphors

Canada is like your attic, you forget that it's up there, but when you go, it's like "Oh man, look at all this great stuff!"

Canada Places

That baby's cuter than a speckled pup in a red wagon.

Appearance Expressions

“Europe needs more self-restraint,” said Tom continently.

Tom Swifties

Farmer: A handy man with a sense of humus.

Definitions Wordplay

He couldn’t pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the heel.

Expressions Intelligence Stupidity

Harder’n baptizing a cat.

Expressions

I don't want to step on your thunder.

Mixed metaphors

Righteous Indignation: Your own wrath, as opposed to the shocking bad temper of others.

Anger Definitions Emotions

So windy he could blow up an onion sack.

Communication Exaggerations Expressions Speech

“Ought I to do this?” asked Tom with a shudder.

Tom Swifties

Yacht: A floating debt.

Definitions

Diet: The penalty for exceeding the feed limit.

Definitions Food/Drink

“I have to wear this cast for another six weeks,” said Tom disjointedly.

Tom Swifties

Cold: An ailment cured in two weeks with a doctor’s care, and in fourteen days without it.

Definitions Doctors Health

Beware my friend… you are skating on hot water.

Mixed metaphors

Definition: A statement intended to put a word in its place.

Communication Definitions Language

Alimony: The screwing you get for the screwing you got.

Definitions Marriage

Altar-Boy: A type of bicycle accident.

Definitions

Civilization: A process whereby one generation finds the questions to the previous generation’s answers.

Definitions

Group Therapy: A drama-in-the-round staged for the entertainment of a professional therapist, who commands the players to put on a new show each week and charges them for the privilege.

Definitions