Author: Anonymous Page 28

Toupée: Top secret.

Appearance Definitions Hair

Conference: A meeting at which people talk about what they should already be doing.

Definitions

Suntan: A pigment of your imagination.

Definitions

Cabbage: A familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man’s head.

Definitions Food/Drink

“This is the wrong tree,” Tom barked, as he climbed up.

Tom Swifties

Death is nature’s way of saying “Howdy.”

Death

Argument: A discussion where two people try to get the last word in first

Definitions

Babysitter: A teenager you hire to watch your TV.

Definitions

“He’s a boring chap,” said Tom indulgently.

Tom Swifties

Yearbook: A book of pictures that get nerdier with time.

Definitions

Aftermath: The horrible headache you have when you’ve finished the algebra test.

Definitions

Tact: The ability to describe others as they see themselves.

Communication Definitions

“I’ve been waiting to see the doctor,” said Tom patiently.

Tom Swifties

Wedding License: A certificate that gives a woman the legal right to drive a man.

Definitions Marriage

He was shaking like a 50¢ ladder.

Expressions

Adage: To become older.

Definitions

“For what we are about to receive, may the Lord make us truly thankful,” said Tom gracefully.

Tom Swifties

Diet: A system of starving yourself to death so you can live a little longer.

Definitions Food/Drink

Courtship: A man pursuing a woman until she catches him.

Dating Definitions Relationships

Hat: Something the average man covers his head with, the beggar passes around, the statesman throws into the ring, and the politician talks through.

Appearance Clothing Definitions

Gentleman: A man who remembers a woman’s birthday but forgets her age.

Definitions Men People