Author: Anonymous Page 30

Sometimes you just have to let sleeping dogs fall where they may.

Mixed metaphors

Satan: The scarecrow in the religious cornfield.

Beliefs Definitions Religion

Tomorrow: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

Definitions Future Time

Diplomacy: The art of letting someone else have your own way.

Definitions

Boat: A hole in the water surrounded by wood into which one pours money.

Definitions Things

“This way to the seabird exhibit”, said Tom awkwardly.

Tom Swifties

Vegetable: A substance used to ballast a child’s plate while it’s carried to and from the table.

Definitions Food/Drink

I think the big guns will come to the boil.

Mixed metaphors

Fiddling with his guitar

Mixed metaphors

Spinster: A lady in waiting.

Definitions People Women

It's always darkest before dawn… so if you're going to steal the neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

Beliefs

“She even flies her own jet,” Tom leered.

Tom Swifties

Discretion: When you are sure you are right and then ask your wife.

Definitions

Philanthropist: One who returns to the people publicly what he steals from them privately.

Definitions People

Lawsuit: A contest generally won by the party that can afford to reimburse the lawyers on both sides of the dispute.

Definitions Law Lawyers

It's as easy as falling off a piece of cake.

Mixed metaphors

Philosophy: Common sense in a dress suit.

Definitions Intelligence Wisdom

“My bicycle wheel is damaged,” said Tom outspokenly.

Tom Swifties

Grasping at the straw that broke the camel's back

Mixed metaphors

The head of the body overseeing youth justice…

Mixed metaphors

Racehorse: A fast means of redistributing wealth.

Activities Definitions