Author: Anonymous Page 35

A waist is a terrible thing to mind.

Mixed metaphors

Litigant: A person about to give up his skin for the hope of retaining his bones.

Definitions Law

History: The version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.

Definitions History Time

Smile: To expose a portion of one’s skeleton as a gesture of goodwill toward a fellow human.

Definitions

“Don’t call me a oddball,” Tom replied evenly.

Tom Swifties

Democracy: A system whereby the person who never votes can cuss out the man the other people elected.

Definitions Democracy Elections/Voting Government

It's like ice cold electricity passing through your body.

Mixed metaphors

Chivalry: The attitude of a man toward somebody else’s wife.

Definitions

“Don’t you know my name?” asked Tom swiftly.

Tom Swifties

You have the right to remain silent; anything you say will be misquoted then used against you.

Communication Law Speech

“I’m mentioned in this book,” said Tom contentedly.

Tom Swifties

“That’s more or less correct,” Tom said roughly.

Tom Swifties

Abort: To correct a misconception.

Definitions

Rattle some feathers.

Mixed metaphors

He used to kiss her on her lips, but it's all over now.

Situations

Doctor: A guy who tells you if you don’t cut out something he’ll cut something out of you.

Definitions Doctors Health

A veritable land mine of valuable information.

Malaprops

“I’ve never had a car accident,” said Tom recklessly.

Tom Swifties

Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!

Husbands Marriage

Information travels more surely to those with a lesser need to know.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws People

He's between a rock and the deep blue sea.

Mixed metaphors