Author: Anonymous Page 38

This will help us to know that we are covering all of the gamuts.

Mixed metaphors

It's like locking the barn door after the nuts have bolted.

Mixed metaphors

I'm on a wrong-way street!

Driving Malaprops

“Phew! I’ve just finished learning all Shakespeare’s works,” said Tom willfully.

Tom Swifties

He was a man of great statue.

Appearance Body Malaprops

Long road to hoe

Malaprops

Bus: A vehicle that has empty seats when going in the opposite direction.

Definitions

Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.

Intelligence Memory Past

Success can be insured only by devising a defense against failure of the contingency plan.

Failure Murphy’s Laws Problems Success

Monastery: Consecration camp.

Definitions Religion

Slander: To lie, or tell the truth, about someone.

Communication Definitions

“That’s price-fixing!” said Tom caustically.

Tom Swifties

“I was adopted,” said Tom transparently.

Tom Swifties

Take time to stop and smell the tunnel at the end of the rainbow.

Mixed metaphors

Venereal Disease: Germs of endearment.

Definitions Health

A man can do more than he thinks he can, but he usually does less than he thinks he does.

Work

“I can’t march any more!” the soldier called haltingly.

Tom Swifties

No one is listening until you make a mistake.

Beliefs Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Proverbs

Motherhood: If it was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor.

Definitions

Chiropodist: A man who makes money hand over foot.

Definitions Doctors Occupations

Deficit: What you have when you don’t have as much as if you had nothing.

Definitions Money