Author: Anonymous Page 38

Take Home Pay: An amount of money which is called that because it is never big enough to go anywhere else with it.

Definitions Money

He’s so skinny, his pants had only one back pocket.

Appearance Body Expressions

Never put all your eggs in one omelet.

Mixed metaphors

Don't bite the hand that lays the golden egg.

Mixed metaphors

Parents: One of the hardships of a minor’s life.

Definitions Family Parents

Cuddling: An act of warmth and affection that a husband will inevitably interpret as foreplay.

Definitions

When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.

Communication Language

The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.

Characteristics

It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.

Food/Drink Money Success

Window: A looking-out glass.

Definitions Things

“Oops, I’ve ripped my pants!” was Tom’s unseemly comment.

Tom Swifties

Any attempt to print Murphy's laws will jam the printer.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

They’re diabolically opposed.

Malaprops

Wink: A whether signal.

Definitions

“I wonder if there’s a number between seven and nine,” said Tom considerately.

Tom Swifties

Smilin’ like a goat in a briarpatch

Appearance Expressions

When you go into court you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people that weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty.

Government Intelligence Law

Kill two cats with one bag.

Mixed metaphors

Our organization really frowns down on that.

Mixed metaphors

They paired off, one by one.

Mixed metaphors

I can read him like the back of my book.

Mixed metaphors