Author: Anonymous Page 41

Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary!

People

She is going to join the gym to lose some weights.

Activities Exercise Misspokements

Chicken: An egg factory.

Animals Definitions

Artist’s Model: A girl unsuited for her work.

Definitions

People are dying like hotcakes.

Mixed metaphors

They start with all that sucking and blowing and in the end you lose your house.

Marriage

“I think I’ll use a different font,” said Tom boldly.

Tom Swifties

An argument is a question with two sides and no end.

Beliefs Communication

Boss: A person who comes early to see who comes late.

Definitions Work

There is nothing so unbecoming on the beach as a wet kilt.

Appearance Clothing

He is so fat… his high school graduation picture was an aerial photograph.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

Consultant: Someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.

Definitions

To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles.

Government Politics

Yogurt: Semi-solid dairy product made from partially evaporated and fermented milk. Yogurt is one of only three foods that taste exactly the same as they sound. The other two being goulash and squid.

Definitions Food/Drink

There is no halftime for cheerleaders!

Activities Sports

Intuition: Suspicion in skirts.

Definitions

It's a big nut to swallow.

Mixed metaphors

A rolling stone kills no birds.

Mixed metaphors

If I was doin’ any better, I’d have ta hire somebody to help me enjoy it!

Emotions Expressions Happiness Life

Democracy is three wolves and a sheep voting on what’s for lunch.

Democracy Government

Procrastination: The art of keeping up with yesterday.

Definitions