Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Author: Anonymous Page 41
Keep your nose up!
Anonymous
Mixed metaphors
Optimism
Science Fiction: Fairy tales for nerds.
Anonymous
Communication
Definitions
Science/Weather
Science fiction
To the max degree
Anonymous
Mixed metaphors
A rolling stone gathers momentum.
Anonymous
Science/Weather
Situations
Rolling stones
If there’s ever a price on your head – take it.
Anonymous
Insults
Retort to a heckler
Yacht: A floating debt.
Anonymous
Definitions
Boat
Yacht
“Get out of here!” said Tom believingly.
Anonymous
Tom Swifties
I guess you could say I'm an
internal
optometrist.
Anonymous
Malaprops
Eternal
Optimism
She is so ugly… when she goes swimming the tide goes out.
Anonymous
Appearance
Exaggerations
Ugly
Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.
Anonymous
Alcohol
Food/Drink
Health
Life
Anesthesia
As long as that dog hunts, we’ll ride him,
Anonymous
Mixed metaphors
“This pencil tip is dull,” she said pointedly.
Anonymous
Tom Swifties
Homer also wrote the
Oddity.
Anonymous
Books
Malaprops
Reading/Writing
Odyssey
Cross-Eyed Teacher: A teacher that loses control over his or her pupils.
Anonymous
Definitions
Cross-Eyed Teacher
Sarcasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the recipient who doesn’t get it.
Anonymous
Communication
Definitions
Sarcasm
Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many people a company can operate without.
Anonymous
People
Business conventions
… just to relieve the
monopoly.
Anonymous
Malaprops
Situations
Boredom
Monotony
“Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess,” Tom began grimly.
Anonymous
Tom Swifties
Acupuncture: A jab well done.
Anonymous
Definitions
Acupuncture
Winter: The time of year when it gets later earlier.
Anonymous
Definitions
Science/Weather
Seasons
Winter
I hate to put you through all this rigor mortis.
Anonymous
Mixed metaphors
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