Author: Anonymous Page 47

Stomach: The home of the swallow.

Definitions

Widow: A woman who knows her husband’s whereabouts at all times.

Definitions Marriage

Actions speak louder than words — but not so often.

Communication

She has initiated and is very remorseful.

Characteristics Malaprops

How can you tell when sour cream goes bad?

Food/Drink Situations

It was not the apple on the tree but the pair on the ground that caused the trouble in the garden.

Beliefs People Religion Sex

Alarm Clock: Something that makes people rise and whine.

Definitions Wordplay

I used to be indecisive… but I'm not sure.

Characteristics

“I caught two hares”, said Tom abrasively.

Tom Swifties

“Do you buy and sell stolen goods?” asked Tom offensively.

Tom Swifties

You've gotta stick your neck out on a limb sometimes.

Mixed metaphors

Tact: The ability to describe others as they see themselves.

Communication Definitions

She's skating on thin water.

Mixed metaphors

Delayed Payment: A tourniquet applied at the pockets.

Definitions Money

“It’s the quotient of two integers,” said Tom rationally.

Tom Swifties

Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark.

Appearance Body Definitions

“Hey, you’re on my foot!” said Tom standoffishly.

Tom Swifties

It is so dry… I caught a catfish that had ticks on him.

Exaggerations Science/Weather

You're pulling my leg over my eyes.

Mixed metaphors

Clichés: Fixtures of speech.

Definitions Language

If he fell into a pile of horse shit, he’d start looking for a pony.

Characteristics Expressions