Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Author: Anonymous Page 48
Taxation: The process by which money is collected from the people to pay the salaries of the men who do the collecting.
Anonymous
Definitions
Government
Taxes
Taxation
Don't do the crime if you can't get out the kitchen.
Anonymous
Mixed metaphors
What is the probability that something will happen according to the odds?
Anonymous
Uncategorized
Odds
I’ll get it by hook or ladder.
Anonymous
Mixed metaphors
Courage: Fear in action.
Anonymous
Definitions
Courage
Fear
Keep your eyes
pierced,
it's got to be around here somewhere.
Anonymous
Malaprops
Peeled
Diplomacy: The art of letting someone else have your own way.
Anonymous
Definitions
Diplomacy
Geologist: Fault finder.
Anonymous
Definitions
Wordplay
Geologist
Flirt: A girl who got the boy you wanted.
Anonymous
Definitions
Flirt
He is not the sharpest cookie in the jar.
Anonymous
Mixed metaphors
Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Anonymous
Definitions
Etc.
“Don’t give me the gears!” said Tom automatically.
Anonymous
Tom Swifties
Let’s start at square zero.
Anonymous
Mixed metaphors
Tolerance: That uncomfortable feeling that the other fellow might be right after all.
Anonymous
Beliefs
Characteristics
Definitions
Tolerance
Class Reunion: Where everyone gets together to see who is falling apart
Anonymous
Definitions
Class Reunion
He is so ugly… when he walks into the bank they turn off the cameras.
Anonymous
Appearance
Exaggerations
Ugly
“This tooth extraction could take for ever,” said Tom with infinite wisdom.
Anonymous
Tom Swifties
Kin: An affliction of the blood.
Anonymous
Definitions
Family
Kin
“You dance just like Fred Astaire,” she said gingerly.
Anonymous
Tom Swifties
Zircon: A diamond falsie.
Anonymous
Definitions
Diamond
Zircon
Childish Games: Those at which your wife beats you.
Anonymous
Activities
Definitions
Games
Childish Games
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