Author: Anonymous Page 48

Rattlesnake: Tattle tail.

Animals Definitions Wordplay

Long road to hoe.

Mixed metaphors

It dawned across my head.

Mixed metaphors

Don’t be discouraged if your children reject your advice; years later they will offer it to their offspring.

Beliefs Children Family Opinion

Abdicate: To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

Body Definitions

They're in the trenches; they're on the horse and they're riding it.

Mixed metaphors

Urinal: The one place where all men are peers.

Definitions Wordplay

He is so ugly… the psychiatrist makes him lie face down.

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

Once the horse is out of the barn, you can't put him back again.

Mixed metaphors

They burnt the midnight candle to resolve the issues.

Mixed metaphors

Life: Coming into the world wit nothing, leaving with nothing and, in between, giving everything to the IRS.

Definitions Life Taxes

Love is a matter of chemistry; sex is a matter of physics.

Emotions Love Sex

“I’m falling into a void,” said Tom flawlessly.

Tom Swifties

War is hell on wheels.

Mixed metaphors

Even a spotted pig looks black at night.

Expressions Situations

We have taken care of all of the silver bullets.

Mixed metaphors

Dreams do come through.

Malaprops

“Aha! Here’s someone who can’t speak!” exclaimed Tom dumbfoundedly.

Tom Swifties

Babysitter: One who accepts hush money.

Definitions

Travel Brochure: A trip teaser.

Definitions

Realtor: A man with lots to sell.

Definitions Occupations Wordplay