Author: Anonymous Page 53

I think the big guns will come to the boil.

Mixed metaphors

I wouldn't trust him with my bargepole.

Mixed metaphors

“I’ve gained thirty pounds,” said Tom heavily.

Tom Swifties

Running around like a chicken with its legs cut off

Mixed metaphors

“My giant sea creature died,” Tom wailed blubberingly.

Tom Swifties

Rummage Sale: Where you buy stuff from somebody else’s attic to store in your own.

Activities Definitions Shopping Things

Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your mouth is moving.

Communication Education Learning Speech

Accordionated: Being able to drive and refold a road map at the same time.

Definitions Wordplay

Just when you see the light at the end of the tunnel, the roof caves in!

Situations

Hot Pants: Breeches of promise.

Appearance Clothing Definitions

Kiss: A course of procedure, cunningly devised, for the mutual stoppage of speech at a moment when words are superfluous.

Definitions

There's more that one way to skin the cat out of the bag.

Mixed metaphors

I'm happier than a woodpecker in a lumber yard.

Miscellaneous

If what you don't know can't hurt you, she's practically invulnerable.

Education Insults

Derange: Where de buffalo roam.

Definitions

Many a man fails as an original thinker simply because his memory is too good.

Intelligence Memory Wisdom

Dentist: A collector of old magazines.

Definitions Occupations

She had a seashore disorder.

Health Malaprops

An ideal mind is the devil's playground.

Misspokements

Keep your eyes pierced, it's got to be around here somewhere.

Malaprops

He is so dumb… his dog teaches him tricks.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity