Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Author: Anonymous Page 59
They're a legend before their time.
Anonymous
Mixed metaphors
The Norwegian language has been described as German spoken underwater.
Anonymous
Communication
Language
Places
Norway
Clarification: To fill in the background with so many details that the foreground goes underground.
Anonymous
Definitions
Clarification
A bird in the hand is mightier than the sword.
Anonymous
Mixed metaphors
“You don’t see the point, do you?” asked Tom, stabbing in the dark.
Anonymous
Tom Swifties
She is so fat… when you tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
The shit’s gonna hit the stick.
Anonymous
Mixed metaphors
But I don't have an
intricate
relationship with it.
Anonymous
Malaprops
Intimate
District of Columbia: A territory bounded on all sides by the United States of America.
Anonymous
Definitions
Places
District of Columbia
Some folks are so highly educated they can bore you on any subject.
Anonymous
Education
“This boat leaks,” said Tom balefully.
Anonymous
Tom Swifties
I'm proud of my humility.
Anonymous
Characteristics
Humility
Oxymorons
Pride
Motherhood: If it was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor.
Anonymous
Definitions
Childbirth
Motherhood
“I’m about to hit the golf ball,” Tom forewarned.
Anonymous
Tom Swifties
He's a pretty sharp cookie.
Anonymous
Mixed metaphors
“The prisoners set up a company,” the warden confirmed.
Anonymous
Tom Swifties
Bore: One who insists upon talking about himself when you want to talk about yourself.
Anonymous
Definitions
Self
Bore
Conversation
If things get any better, I may have to hire someone to help me enjoy it.
Anonymous
Characteristics
Expressions
Situations
Good
“Who is this Tom Swifty character anyway?” asked Tom unselfconsciously.
Anonymous
Tom Swifties
Damp weather is very hard on the
sciences.
Anonymous
Malaprops
Sinuses
Cricket: A game which the English, not being a spiritual people, have invented in order to give themselves some conception of eternity.
Anonymous
Definitions
Sports
Cricket
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