Author: Anonymous Page 59

They're a legend before their time.

Mixed metaphors

The Norwegian language has been described as German spoken underwater.

Communication Language Places

Clarification: To fill in the background with so many details that the foreground goes underground.

Definitions

A bird in the hand is mightier than the sword.

Mixed metaphors

“You don’t see the point, do you?” asked Tom, stabbing in the dark.

Tom Swifties

She is so fat… when you tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

The shit’s gonna hit the stick.

Mixed metaphors

But I don't have an intricate relationship with it.

Malaprops

District of Columbia: A territory bounded on all sides by the United States of America.

Definitions Places

Some folks are so highly educated they can bore you on any subject.

Education

“This boat leaks,” said Tom balefully.

Tom Swifties

I'm proud of my humility.

Characteristics

Motherhood: If it was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor.

Definitions

“I’m about to hit the golf ball,” Tom forewarned.

Tom Swifties

He's a pretty sharp cookie.

Mixed metaphors

“The prisoners set up a company,” the warden confirmed.

Tom Swifties

Bore: One who insists upon talking about himself when you want to talk about yourself.

Definitions Self

If things get any better, I may have to hire someone to help me enjoy it.

Characteristics Expressions Situations

“Who is this Tom Swifty character anyway?” asked Tom unselfconsciously.

Tom Swifties

Damp weather is very hard on the sciences.

Malaprops

Cricket: A game which the English, not being a spiritual people, have invented in order to give themselves some conception of eternity.

Definitions Sports