Author: Anonymous Page 60

Great Timesaver: Love at first sight.

Definitions

Budget: Telling your money where to go instead of wondering where it went.

Definitions

These felled trees are the beavers’ handiwork!

Mixed metaphors

Home: A place where a man is free to say anything he pleases because no one pays any attention to him.

Definitions Places

You can’t have your hill and die on it too.

Mixed metaphors

Suntan: A pigment of your imagination.

Definitions

Business Forecaster: A person who is uncertain about the future and hazy about the present.

Definitions

Court Of Law: A place where a suit is pressed and a man maybe taken to the cleaners.

Definitions Law

Some folks are so highly educated they can bore you on any subject.

Education

Delegate-At-Large: A man at a convention whose wife didn’t accompany him.

Definitions

That will round out the triangle.

Mixed metaphors

I shot the wind out of his saddle.

Mixed metaphors

Bus Driver: A person who tells people where to get off.

Activities Definitions Driving Occupations

Amateur Athlete: An athlete who is paid in cash, not by check..

Definitions

Gossip: Anything that goes in one ear and over the back fence.

Communication Definitions Speech

“My wife is going to have a test tube baby”, Tom injected artificially.

Tom Swifties

“I pulled a hamstring,” said Tom limply.

Tom Swifties

I'm going to the store to buy a soup latrine.

Malaprops

Time: The arbitrary division of eternity.

Definitions Time

Apologize: To lay the foundation for a future offense.

Definitions

Short Vacation: Half a loaf.

Activities Definitions