Author: Anonymous Page 62

Deluxe: Mediocre in a big way.

Definitions

Shyster: The other fellow’s lawyer.

Definitions Lawyers

Businessman: One who talks golf all morning at the office, and business all afternoon on the links.

Definitions Golf Occupations

Year: The exact length of time that will pass from the day you get married to the day you forget your first anniversary.

Definitions Marriage Time

We raised it to new depths.

Mixed metaphors

Our organization really frowns down on that.

Mixed metaphors

A fool and his money is a friend indeed.

Fools Friends Intelligence Money People

A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one Year and out the other.

Beliefs Communication Language

I turned a blind eye to all that bad stuff I was hearing.

Mixed metaphors

That's the whole kettle of fish in a nutshell.

Mixed metaphors

Looting: A public shopping spree generously sponsored by local merchants in the wake of a riot.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Crime Definitions

Abbreviation: An inordinately long word in light of its meaning.

Communication Definitions Language

If these walls could talk, they'd probably say, "No! Not the nails again! Not the hammer!

Communication Wordplay

Interesting: A word a man uses to describe a woman who lets him do all the talking.

Communication Definitions Speech

God wisely designed the human body so that we can neither pat our own backs nor kick ourselves too easily.

Beliefs God People Self

Toothache: The pain that drives you to extraction.

Definitions Health

Great Timesaver: Love at first sight.

Definitions

Accountant: One who uses your books to figure his profit.

Definitions Occupations

Sleet: A slipcover.

Definitions Science/Weather

Actions speak louder than words — but not so often.

Communication

Keep a stiff upper chin.

Mixed metaphors