Author: Anonymous Page 67

“I like ragged margins,” said Tom without justification.

Tom Swifties

Abdicate: To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

Body Definitions

This is really a jack of all trades and master of non.

Misspokements

God wisely designed the human body so that we can neither pat our own backs nor kick ourselves too easily.

Beliefs God People Self

“I couldn’t believe there were 527,986 bees in the swarm!” Tom recounted.

Tom Swifties

“My bicycle wheel is damaged,” said Tom outspokenly.

Tom Swifties

“Pretend we were in the days before railways,” Tom coached.

Tom Swifties

Foreword: An author’s apology.

Books Definitions

Due process of elimination

Mixed metaphors

Innocent Bystander: A person so simple-minded he doesn’t know enough to get out of the way.

Definitions

Alcohol is ok in modification.

Alcohol Food/Drink Malaprops

Taxes: A funding method which allows people to test their powers of deduction.

Definitions Taxes

Adage: To become older.

Definitions

Committee: A cul-de-sac down which ideas are lured and then quietly strangled.

Definitions

Courage: Fear in action.

Definitions

Forget that guy – just illiterate him from your memory.

Malaprops

She is going to join the gym to lose some weights.

Activities Exercise Misspokements

Education: One of the few things a person is willing to pay for and not get.

Definitions Education

Indifference: A woman’s feeling towards a man, which is interpreted by the man as “playing hard to get.”

Definitions

Tailor: An occupation that suits everyone.

Definitions Occupations Work

Whether the glass is half-full or half empty, depends on whether you are drinking or pouring.

Situations