Author: Anonymous Page 67

Zipping one’s lips and throwing away the key

Mixed metaphors

Let’s not open that can of worms until we get this one nailed down.

Mixed metaphors

I can syncronize with those homeless people.

Malaprops

He’s still green behind the ears.

Mixed metaphors

Violinist: A high-strung musician.

Definitions Entertainment Music Wordplay

Adage: To become older.

Definitions

Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.

Characteristics Communication Lies

Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?

Expressions Marriage

Chicken: An egg factory.

Animals Definitions

Antique: An object that has made a round trip to the attic.

Definitions Things

Bull Market: A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

Definitions

Accountant: Someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand.

Definitions Occupations

Bore: A person who has nothing to say and says it.

Definitions

As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.

Education Religion School

Intimacy: The first step toward parenthood.

Definitions

Breeding: Concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.

Definitions

… just to relieve the monopoly.

Malaprops Situations

Old Age: When you don’t recognize either the host or the musical guest on Saturday Night Live.

Age Definitions

Gigolo: A fee-male.

Definitions Wordplay

Argument: A discussion where two people try to get the last word in first

Definitions

Good Neighbor: A fellow who smiles at you over the back fence, but doesn’t climb it.

Definitions