Author: Anonymous Page 68

“Sorry about that butt call,” he said cheekily.

Tom Swifties

Diet: Something you keep putting off while you keep putting on.

Definitions Food/Drink

I am sure I have done everything in my power since I exploded the affair.

Malaprops

Callous: Gifted with great fortitude to bear the evils afflicting another.

Characteristics Definitions

Let’s split the baby with the bathwater.

Mixed metaphors

Budget: A schedule for going into debt systematically.

Definitions

Easy: Used to describe a woman who has the sexual morals of a man.

Definitions People Sex Women

They live in a two-storage house.

Malaprops

“Pass the playing cards,” said Tom ideally.

Tom Swifties

He is so fat… his blood type is Ragu.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

An Irishman is not drunk as long as he still has a blade of grass to hang onto.

Alcohol Food/Drink People

There's light at the end of this rainbow.

Mixed metaphors

Selfishness: A state of mine.

Definitions

That guy is a wolf in cheap clothing.

Mixed metaphors

A woman who strives to be like a man lacks ambition.

Characteristics Men People Women

Never judge a book by its title.

Mixed metaphors

Deluxe: Mediocre in a big way.

Definitions

Isn't it nice to not have to look over our backs anymore?

Mixed metaphors

Always remember: golf clubs don’t float.

Golf Sports

“Consult an investment broker,” was Tom’s stock answer.

Tom Swifties

You can dish it out, but you can't take it with you.

Mixed metaphors